Drinkin Jokes / Recent Jokes
The patch thing is going way to far....smoking patches, lose weight patches,
now this....
Two rednecks, Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of
bottles of Bud. The passenger, Bubba, said "lookey thar up ahead, Earl, it's a
poll-ice roadblock! We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here beers!!"
Don't worry, Bubba", Earl said. "We'll just pull over and finish drinkin'
these beers, peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, and throw the
bottles under the seat".
"What fer?", asked Bubba.
"Just let me do the talkin', OK?", said Earl.
Well, they finished their beers, threw the empty bottles under the seat, and
each put a label on their forehead. When they reached the roadblock, the
sheriff said, "You boys been drinkin'?"
"No, sir", said Earl. "We're on the patch".
Two rednecks, Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of bottles of Bud. The passenger, Bubba, said "Lookey thar up ahead, Earl, it's a police roadblock!! We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here beers!!" "Don't worry, Bubba," Earl said. "We'll just pull over and finish drinkin' these beers then peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, and throw the bottles under the seat." "What fer?", asked Bubba. "Just let me do the talkin', OK?," said Earl. Well, they finished their beers, threw the empties out of sight & put label on each of their foreheads. When they reached the roadblock, the sheriff said, "You boys been drinkin'?" "No, sir," said Earl while pointing at the labels. "We're on the patch."
GRANDMA GOT RUN OVER BY A REINDEER
by Irish Rovers (1986?)
Grandma got run over by a reindeer
Walking home from our house Christmas eve.
You can say there's no such thing as Santa,
But as for me and Grandpa, we believe.
She'd been drinkin' too much egg nog,
And we'd begged her not to go.
But she'd left her medication,
So she stumbled out the door into the snow.
When they found her Christmas mornin',
At the scene of the attack.
There were hoof prints on her forehead,
And incriminatin' Claus marks on her back.
Grandma go run over by a reindeer,
Walkin' home from our house Christmas eve.
You can say there's no such thing as Santa,
But as for me and Grandpa, we believe.
Now were all so proud of Grandpa,
He's been takin' this so well.
See him in there watchin' football,
Drinkin' beer and playin' cards with cousin Belle.
It's not Christmas without Grandma.
All the family's more...
Two rednecks, Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of bottles of Bud.
The passenger, Bubba, said, "Lookey thar up ahead, Earl, it's a po-lice roadblock! We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here beers!!"
"Don't worry, Bubba," Earl said. "We'll just pull over and finish drinkin' these beers, peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, and throw the bottles under the seat."
"What fer?" asked Bubba.
"Just let me do the talkin', OK?" said Earl.
Well, they finished their beers, threw the empty bottles under the seat, and each put a label on their forehead.
When they reached the roadblock, the sheriff said, "You boys been drinkin'?"...
"No sir," Earl said. "We're on the patch."
Two rednecks, Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of bottles of Bud.
The passenger, Bubba, said "Lookey thar up ahead, Earl, it's a police roadblock! We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here beers!!"
"Don't worry, Bubba," Earl said. "We'll just pull over and finish drinkin' these beers then peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, and throw the bottles under the seat."
"What fer?", asked Bubba.
"Just let me do the talkin', OK?," said Earl.
Well, they finished their beers, threw the empties out of sight & put label on each of their foreheads.
When they reached the roadblock, the sheriff said, "You boys been drinkin'?"
"No, sir," said Earl while pointing at the labels. "We're on the patch."