Ducked Jokes / Recent Jokes

There were three female explorers who decided that they would go explore the African jungle together. One blonde, one brunnette and one redhead.
They were near the middle of the jungle when a rare african tribe surrounded them. The tribe said that the gods have sent them evil things and the explorers shall be poo head destroyed. The tribe was going to shoot them with a bow and arrow in the not head one at a time.
First they were going to shoot at the brunnette. She stepped up and they called 1-2-3 but before they could shoot she yelled TORNADO and everyone ducked and lay down on the ground and the brunnette ran way while they ducked. The tribe got mad and swore but did not go after her.
Then the redneck stepped up and they aimed and yelled 1-2-3.. but before they could shoot she screeched FLOOD and everyone jumped and climbed up the nearest tree. The redhead took advantage and ran away. They got really mad and swore but did not go after her.
They didn't like people more...

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead were all about to get executed. The shooter aimed at the redhead and asked if she had any last words. She shook her head, and the executer yelled, "READY? AIM-"
The redhead then called out, "TORNADO!!"
As a human reflex, they ducked, and the redhead ran off. The executers ignored her and aimed at the brunette. They asked if she had any last words and she shook her head no. "READY AIM-" He called again, but the brunette shouted, "EARTHQUAKE"
As they once again, ducked. The blond was catching on, so when they asked if she had any last words, she shook her head. The man signaled his hand and called "READY, AIM-" She quickly yelled, "FIRE!!!"

there were three friends
two walked in to a bar an the third one ducked
(a bar like a meatl bar and the third one ducked under it)

President Clinton and Saddam Hussein were having a meeting in Baghdad to discuss a recent crisis.
Halfway through the meeting, Hussein hit a button on his armrest, a fake arm flew out and struck Clinton in the face. A short while later, Hussein hit another button and Clinton ducked, only to be kicked in the butt. Some minutes later, this happened again. An angry Clinton called a break and the two decided to meet again later, this time in Washington.
Hussein arrived in Washington and the two sat down in Clinton's office to resume their meeting. A few minutes into the discussions, Clinton hit a button and Hussein ducked, but nothing happened. Minutes later, Clinton hit another button and Hussein ducked, but again nothing happened.
When this happened a third time, an angry and paranoid Hussein jumped up and yelled, "Enough of this! I am returning to Baghdad immediately!"
Looking at Hussein with a sly smirk, Clinton calmed replied, "What Baghdad?"

There were three female explorers who decided that they would go explore the African jungle together. One blonde, one brunnette and one redhead.
They were near the middle of the jungle when a rare African tribe surrounded them. The tribe said that the gods have sent them evil things and the explorers shall be destroyed. The tribe was going to shoot them with a bow and arrow in the head one at a time.
First they were going to shoot at the brunnette. She stepped up and they called, "1-2-3", but before they could shoot she yelled, "TORNADO!", and everyone ducked and lay down on the ground and the brunnette ran way while they ducked. The tribe got mad and swore but did not go after her.
Then the redneck stepped up and they aimed and yelled, "1-2-3", but before they could shoot she screeched, "FLOOD!", and everyone jumped and climbed up the nearest tree. The redhead took advantage and ran away. They got really mad and swore but did not go more...