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"I have lurnt Word Perfect 6.0 computor and spreasheet progroms." "Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details." "Received a plague for Salesperson of the Year." "Wholly responsible for two (2) failed financial institutions." "Reason for leaving last job: maturity leave." "Failed bar exam with relatively high grades." "It's best for employers that I not work with people." "Let's meet, so you can' ooh' and' aah' over my experience." "I was working for my mom until she decided to move." "Marital status: single. Unmarried. Unengaged. Uninvolved. No commitments." "I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse." "I am loyal to my employer at all costs. Please feel free to respond to my resume on my office voice mail." "My goal is to be a meteorologist. But since I possess no training in meteorology, I suppose I should try stock more...

These are taken from real resumes and cover letters and were printed in Fortune Magazine:

1. I demand a salary commiserate with my extensive experience.
2. I have lurnt Word Perfect 6. 0 computor and spreadsheet progroms.
3. Received a plague for Salesperson of the Year.
4. Reason for leaving last job: maturity leave.
5. Wholly responsible for two (2) failed financial institutions.
6. Its best for employers that I not work with people.
7. Lets meet, so you can ooh and aah over my experience.
8. You will want me to be Head Honcho in no time.
9. Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details.
10. I was working for my mom until she decided to move.
11. Failed bar exam with relatively high grades.
12. Marital status: single. Unmarried. Unengaged. Uninvolved. No Commitments.
13. I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse.
14. I am loyal to my employer at all costs... Please feel free to more...

These are taken from real resumes and cover letters and were printed in Fortune Magazine: 1. I demand a salary commiserate with my extensive experience. 2. I have lurnt Word Perfect 6. 0 computor and spreadsheet progroms. 3. Received a plague for Salesperson of the Year. 4. Reason for leaving last job: maturity leave. 5. Wholly responsible for two (2) failed financial institutions. 6. Its best for employers that I not work with people. 7. Lets meet, so you can ooh and aah over my experience. 8. You will want me to be Head Honcho in no time. 9. Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details. 10. I was working for my mom until she decided to move. 11. Failed bar exam with relatively high grades. 12. Marital status: single. Unmarried. Unengaged. Uninvolved. No Commitments. 13. I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse. 14. I am loyal to my employer at all costs... Please feel free to respond to my resume on my office voice mail. 15. I have become completely more...

From actual resumes as reported by Fortune Magazine:

"I have lurnt WordPerfect 6.0 computor and spreadsheat progroms"

"Received a plague for Salesperson of the Year."

"Reason for leaving last job: Maturity leave."

"Wholly responsible for two (2) failed financial institutions."

"Failed bar exam with relatively high grades."

"It's best for employers that I not work with people."

"Let's meet, so you can "ooh" and "aah" over my experience."

"You will want me to be Head Honcho in no time."

"Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details."

"I was working for my mom until she decided to move."

"Marital status: single. Unmarried. Unengaged. Uninvolved. No commitments."

"I have an excellent track record, although I am not more...

These are taken from real resumes and cover letters and were printed in Fortune Magazine:
1. I demand a salary commiserate with my extensive experience.
2. I have lurnt Word Perfect 6.0 computor and spreadsheet progroms.
3. Received a plague for Salesperson of the Year.
4. Reason for leaving last job: maturity leave.
5. Wholly responsible for two (2) failed financial institutions.
6. Its best for employers that I not work with people.
7. Lets meet, so you can ooh and aah over my experience.
8. You will want me to be Head Honcho in no time.
9. Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details.
10. I was working for my mom until she decided to move.
11. Failed bar exam with relatively high grades.
12. Marital status: single. Unmarried. Unengaged. Uninvolved. No Commitments.
13. I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse.
14. I am loyal to my employer at all costs... Please feel free to respond to my resume on more...