Fun List Jokes

A guy's butt is never a factor in a job interview.

A guy's orgasms are real. Always.

He doesn't have to curl up next to a hairy butt every night.

Foreplay is optional.

He never feels compelled to stop a friend from getting laid.

He doesn't give a rat's ass if someone notices his new haircut.

The world is his urinal

He never has to drive to another gas station because "this one's just too icky."

Same work......more pay.

Wrinkles add character.

People never glance at his chest when he is talking to them.

The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.

Porn movies are designed with him in mind.

Not liking a person does not preclude having great sex with them.

Your kid may be an Honor Student, but YOU'RE still an idiot.

Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips.

I took an IQ test and the results were negative.

Where there's a will...I want to be in it.

It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.

Don't drink and drive...You might hit a bump and spill your drink.

Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

Always remember you're unique...Just like everyone else.

Who lit the fuse on your tampon?

I don't have a license to kill. I have a learner's permit.

I wasn't born a bitch. Men like you made me this way.

Taxation WITH representation isn't so hot, either!

Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.

EARTH FIRST! We'll stripmine the other planets later.

If you can read this I can hit my brakes and sue you.

Powerful Microscope, hosted by Seymour Cells

Defending Yourself in the Courtroom, hosted by Iris Mye Case

Safe River Crossing, hosted by Jethro D. Bote

Home Demolition, hosted by Wallace Falling

Curing Hunger Pangs, hosted by Aida Bigg Snacke

TV Alternatives, hosted by Rita Goode Booke

Solving Crimes, hosted by Anita Clew

Protecting Your Valuables, hosted by Jules R. Missing

How to Make Leather Crafts, hosted by Tanya Hide

Giving Class Assembly Speeches, hosted by Audie Torium

How to Sleep in Class While the Teacher Gives Notes, hosted by Chuck Bored

Nice Set of Floppies!

Hey, how' bout I take off your cover and insert a bigger CPU.

I'd like to play on your laptop.

Need me to unzip your files?

If you were an ISP I'd dial you all day long.

I'd like to boot up your PC!

I'll bet my hard drive is the biggest you've ever seen.

I've got a 21 inch... (monitor)

I'd get a T3 to watch your streaming video...

Your homepage or mine?

The bathroom door is closed. Please do not stand here and talk, whine, or ask questions. Wait until I get out. Yes, it is locked. I want it that way. It is not broken, nor am I trapped.

I know that I have left it unlocked at times, and even open at times, once you were born, because I was afraid some horrible tragedy might occur while I was there, but it's been 10 years and I want some privacy.

Do not ask me how long I will be. I will come out when I am done.

Do not bring the phone to the bathroom door. Do not go running back to the phone yelling, "He's in the BATHROOM!"

Do not begin to fight as soon as I go in.

Do not stick your little fingers under the door and wiggle them. This was funny when you were two.

Do not slide pennies, Legos, or notes under the door. Even when you were two, this got to be a little tiresome.

Do not let the dog/cat in because you think he/she "misses more...