Engineer Jokes / Recent Jokes

Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body. One said, "It was a mechanical engineer; just look at all the joints."
Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections."
The last one said, "Actually, it was a civil engineer. I mean, who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?"

A start-up engineer is someone who solves a problem you didn't know you had, in a way you don't understand.

There are three engineers in a car; an electrical engineer, a chemical engineer, and a Microsoft engineer. Suddenly the car just stops by the side of the road, and the three engineers look at each other wondering what could be wrong.
The electrical engineer suggests stripping down the electronics of the car and trying to trace where a fault might have occurred.
The chemical engineer, not knowing much about cars suggests that maybe the fuel is becoming emulsified and getting blocked somewhere.
Then, the Microsoft engineer, not knowing much about anything, comes up with a suggestion. "Why don't we close all the windows, get out, get back in, open the windows again, and maybe it'll work!?"

Edison thought it would be an illuminating experience.

Watt reckoned it would be a good way to let off steam.

Stephenson thought the whole idea was loco.

Wilbur Wright accepted, provided he and Orville could get a flight.

Morse's reply: "I'll be there on the dot. Can't stop now must dash."

There Are Three Engineers In A Car; An Electrical Engineer, A Chemical Engineer And A Microsoft Engineer. Suddenly The Car Just Stops By The Side Of The Road, And The Three Engineers Look At Each Other Wondering What Could Be Wrong.
The Electrical Engineer Suggests Stripping Down The Electronics Of The Car And Trying To Trace Where A Fault Might Have Occurred.
The Chemical Engineer, Not Knowing Much About Cars, Suggests That The Fuel Is Becoming Emulsified And Getting Blocked Somewhere.
Then, The Microsoft Engineer, Not Knowing Much About Anything, Comes Up With A Suggestion: If We Close All The Windows, Get Out, Get Back In, Then Open The Windows Again, Maybe It'll Work!"

A mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer, and a software engineer are in a car that breaks down.
The mechanical engineer says: ''Maybe is's a stuck valve''.
The electical engineer says: ''Maybe it's a dead battery''.
The software engineer says: ''I know. Let's all get out and get back in again, and see if that fixes it''.

Reaching the end of a job interview, the human resources person askeda young engineer fresh out of MIT, "And what starting salary were youlooking for?"The engineer said, "In the neighborhood of $125,000 a year, dependingon the benefits package."The interviewer said, "Well, what would you say to a package of5-weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, companymatching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leasedevery 2 years - say, a red Corvette?"The Engineer sat up straight and said, "Wow! Are you kidding?"And the interviewer replied, "Yeah, but you started it."