FBI Jokes / Recent Jokes

The phone rings at FBI headquarters. “Hello? ”
“Hello, is this FBI? ”
“Yes. What do you want? ”
“I’m calling to report my neighbor Tom. He is hiding marijuana in his firewood. ”
“This will be noted. ”
Next day, the FBI comes over to Tom’s house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept, break every piece of wood, find no marijuana, swear at Tom and leave.
The phone rings at Tom’s house. “Hey, Tom! Did the FBI come? ” “Yeah! ” “Did they chop your firewood? ” “Yeah they did. ” “Okay, now it’s your turn to call. I need my garden plowed. ”

* FBI has handed over the investigations to Pakistani Police who have reported to arrest a suspect who claims that he wanted to have coffee on the 65th floor but their planes didn`t land properly.
* First lady is pregnant and FBI claims that Osama is directly or indirectly involved in it.
* BBC reports that Gen. Musharraf has requested Nawaz Sharif to come back and take over. NO QUESTIONS ASKED.....
* While giving an exclusive interview to CNN Film star REEMA has offered that if " Bush - Afghan problem can be solved on " Kuch lo Kuch Do" basis, then she has offered herself.
* Americans have offered Talibans to handover Osama in exchange of Herion of Titanic. But Taliban say that we already have Heroin and please give the Hero of Titanic.
* Latest marketing strategy of United Airline " Fly with us and we will take you straight to your office"
* CNN Report: US Army troops arrived in Khi, will attact Afghanistan after having Tea at more...

The phone rings at FBI headquarters. "Hello? I'm calling to report my neighbor, Clifford. He is hiding marijuana inside his firewood!" "Thank you very much for the call, sir." The next day, FBI agents descend on the neighbor's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana. They swear at the neighbors and leave. The phone rings at the neighbors house. Hey, Clifford, did the FBI come?" "Yep." "Did they chop your firewood?" "Yep." "Great, now it's your turn to call. I need my garden plowed."

And you can catch it all on Pay-Per-View for $9.11!

CORVALLIS, OREGON: Oregon State football practice was delayed yesterday for two hours.

One of the players, while on his way to the locker room, happened to look down and notice a suspicious-looking, unknown white powdery substance on the practice field. Head Coach Dennis Erickson immediately suspended practice while the FBI was called in to investigate. After a field analysis, the FBI determined that the white substance unknown to the players was the goal line.

Practice was resumed when FBI Special Agents decided that the team would not be likely to encounter the substance again.

One morning the FBI found urine writen on the white house lawn saying Clinton Sucks,
the FBI ran tests on the urine and found out who it was. One FBI agent went to Bill Clinton
and told him I got good news, and I got bad news the good news is it's Al Gores urine, but
the bad news is it's your wifes hand writing.

Knock, knock
Who’s there?
Sorry, wrong door.
Okay.

Knock, knock
Who’s there?
Federal Express
Federal Express who?
I don’t know. I just deliver packages.

Knock, knock
Who’s there?
Tom.
Tom who?
Tom Buchanan.
Hi Tom.

Knock knock
Who’s there?
Pizza delivery guy.
Pizza delivery guy who?
You ordered a pizza?
Yes.
I’m the guy delivering it.
Great.

Knock knock
Who’s there?
Susan.
Susan who?
Susan Caldwell.
I’ll be right out, Susan.

Knock, knock
Who’s there.
You might be a redneck if… you think tobacco is a vegetable.
You might be a redneck if… you think tobacco is a vegetable who?
I thought this was a redneck joke.
Nope. It’s a knock, knock joke.
Oops.

Knock, knock
Who’s there?
Boo
Boo who
Don’t get so upset, more...