Fastest Jokes / Recent Jokes
What's the fastest way to get a nun pregnant? Dress her up as an altar boy.
One day Johnny was at church and ask the priest may I go to the bathroom, the priest said.
"Yes you may."
Johnny left and headed for the woods. He found a big tree and crouched down to take a dump. Meanwhile, the priest went looking for him in the woods.
Johnny heard the priest coming, wiped his butt with a leaf and pulled his pants up. Johnny then took his hat off and put it on top of the poop.
The priest saw him and said, "What do you got underneath there?"
Johnny hesitated and said, " The fastest bird in the world."
The priest said, "Oh yeah, let's see."
"Ok" Johnny said, "On the count of 3, when I take the hat off, I want you to grab the bird."
"1 - 2 - 3." Johnny pulled the hat away and the priest grabbed the poop.
"WOW, that bird is so fast it left the poop behind" said Johnny.
Teacher:-Pls; tell what the fastest thing in the world is
Student 1:- light
Teacher:-why is that?
Student 1:-once switch on other end bulb gives light with no time.
Student 2:- i believe mind
Teacher: - why do u think so
Student 2:-can think anything we want & achieve it in dream with no time
Student 3:- I believe LOOSE MOTION
Teacher: - why is that?
Student 3:- Yesterday I couldn’t even think & even switch on the light sheet pass without giving any chance to think both options, so i believe loose motion is the world fastest thing.
Three boys are in the schoolyard bragging of how great their fathers are.
The first one says, "Well, my father runs the fastest. He can fire an arrow, and start to run, I tell you, he gets there before the arrow."
The second boy says, "Ha! You think that's fast! My father is a hunter. He can shoot his gun and be there before the bullet!"
The third one listens to the other two and shakes his head. He then says, "You two know nothing about speed. My father works in the Govt department. He stops working at 5: 00pm and he is home by 3: 45pm!!"
What are the three fastest means of communication? Internet Telephone Telawoman!
There were 4 guys sitting in a bar. One of them decided to play a little game about what each of them thought was the fastest thing in the world.
Well the first guy says, "I think a Concord Jet is the fastest thing in the world, because it can go faster than the speed of sound."
Well the second guy says, "Well I think I got you beat on that one! I think lightning is the fastest thing in the world, because it can go faster than the speed of light and sound."
Well the third guy says, "Well I believe i have both of you beat. The brain is the fastest thing in the world, because whenever you need something, it is right there for you."
Well the fourth guys clearly states, "Well I have got you all beat! I think the anal sphincter muscle is the fastest thing in the world."
The other three guys say really? Why's that?
And the fourth guys says, "Well I was on a Concord Jet, it got struck by lightning, and I didn't know what to more...