Fishing Jokes / Recent Jokes
One day Jim was out fishing and was not having any luck at all, he tried lures, worms and other types of bait and was just not catching anything. Tom was fishing about 20 feet from him and was catching fish as fast as he cast his line out. Jim was gettingvery jealous of this show off, so he asked the Tom what he was using for bait. The man said,
"I am using worms, but I dip them in whiskey"
Jim got really interested in this technique so he asked Tom if he could try one of these drunk worms. Tom had no problem with this request so he handed Jim one of the worms. Jim placed the worm on the hook and cast out no sooner than his hook hit the water, Jims pole began to bow like crazy, he set his hook and started to reel it in. Once he got his catch up to the shore he noticed that the worm had the fish by the throat......
When fish play football, who is the captain? The team's kipper!
A couple of young guys were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track when out of the bushes jumped the game warden.
Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods like a bat out of hell and hot on his heels came the game warden.
After about a half mile, the guy stopped and stooped over with his hands on his thighs to catch his breath and the game warden finally caught up to him.
"Let's see yer fishin license, boy!" the warden gasped.
With that, the guy pulled out his wallet and gave the game warden a valid fishing license.
"Well, son," said the Game Warden. "You must be about as dumb as a box of rocks! You don't have to run from me if you have a valid license!"
"Yes sir," replied the young feller. "But my friend back there, well, he don't have one..."
One day a priest decided to go down to the dock near his church. He saw a fisherman loading up his boat there. So the priest watched him for awhile. The fiisherman saw the priest and asked him if he wanted to go fishing with him. The priest had nothing to do so he said ok. They went out all day. They only caught one fish all day and it was the priest who caught it. The fisherman said,"That's a big sonofabitch!" The priest was like what did you say. Quickly thinking the fisherman said that is the name of the fish. Later when the priest went back to the church he showed it to the bishop and said look at this sonofabitch I caught. The bishop was like watch you mounth. The priest said no that is the name of the fish. The bishop said ok lets go clean it. They cleaned it and took it to the sister to cook it. She said where did you get the fish from. The priest said I caught the sonofabitch and the bishop cleaned the sonofabitch. The nun was stuned but she cooked it. Later that more...
Q: What do fishermen and hypochondriacs have in common?A: They don't really have to catch anything to be happy.
Wife after returning from fishing trip with husband to neighbor: "I did everything all wrong again today -- I talked too much and too loud. I used the wrong bait. I reeled in too soon and I caught more than he did."