Flask Jokes / Recent Jokes

Santa goes into a store and sees a shiny object. He asks the clerk, "What is that shiny object?"
The clerk replies, "That is a thermos flask." Santa then asks, "What does it do?"
The clerk responds, "It keeps hot things hot and it keeps cold things cold." Santa says, "I ll take it!"
The next day, he walks into work with his new thermos. His sardar boss sees him and asks, "What is that shiny object with you?"
He said, "It s a thermos flask."
The boss then says, "What does it do?"
He replies, "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold."
The boss said, "Wow, what do you have in it?"Santa replies, "Two cups of coffee and a coke."

David Beckham goes shopping, and sees something interesting in the
> kitchen
> department of a large department store. "What's that?" he asks.
>
> "A Thermos flask," replies the assistant. "What does it do?" asks
> Becks.
> The
> assistant tells him it keeps hot things hot and cold things cold.
>
> Really impressed, Beckham buys one and takes it along to his next
> training
> session.
>
> "Here, boys, look at this," Beckham says proudly. "It's a Thermos
> flask."
> The lads are impressed. "What does it do?" they ask. "It keeps hot
> things
> hot and cold things cold,"says David.
>
> "And what have you got in it?" asks Roy Keane.
>
> "Two cups of coffee and a choc ice," replies David.

Two drivers collided on a country road. One was a lawyer, and the other was a doctor.
The lawyer, seeing that the doctor was a little shaken up, helped him from the car and offered him a drink from his whiskey flask.
The doctor accepted and handed the flask back to the lawyer, who closed it and put it away.
“Aren’t you going to have a drink yourself? ” asked the doctor.
“Sure, after the police leave, ” replied the lawyer.

A doctor and a lawyer got into a car accident, on a small country road. The lawyer had figured that nobody else would be on the road, and had raced through a stop sign. The doctor, on a cross street, had no time to react and couldn't have missed the lawyer if he had tried. Fortunately, neither driver was hurt.
The lawyer, seeing that the doctor was a little shaken up, helped him from his battered car and offered him a drink from a hip flask. The doctor accepted, took a deep drink, and handed the flask back to the lawyer. The lawyer held the flask for a minute or two, and gave it to the doctor again. The doctor took another swig. He again returned the flask to the lawyer, who closed it and put it away.
"Aren't you going to have a drink yourself?" asked the doctor.
"Not now," answered the lawyer. "I'll have something after the police leave."

A doctor and a lawyer in two cars collided on a country road.
The lawyer, seeing that the doctor was a little shaken up, helped him from the car and offered him a drink from his hip flask.
The doctor accepted and handed the flask back to the lawyer, who closed it and put it away.
"Aren't you going to have a drink yourself?" asked the doctor.
"Sure, after the police leave," replied the attorney.

A doctor and a lawyer in two cars collided on a country road. The lawyer, seeing that the doctor was a little shaken up, helped him from the car and offered him a drink from his hip flask. The doctor accepted and handed the flask back to the lawyer, who closed it and put it away."Aren't you going to have a drink yourself?" asked the doctor."Sure, after the police leave," replied the lawyer.

A doctor and a lawyer in two cars collided on a country road.
The lawyer, seeing that the doctor was a little shaken up, helped him from the car and offered him a drink from his hip flask.
The doctor accepted and handed the flask back to the lawyer, who closed it and put it away.
Aren't you going to have a drink yourself? asked the doctor.
Sure, after the police leave, replied the attorney.