Football Jokes / Recent Jokes

Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Three-one to sue the power company for insufficiently supplying power, or negligent failure to prevent the surge that made the bulb burn out in the first place, one to sue the electrician who wired the house, and one to sue the bulb manufacturers.

Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Fifty four. Eight to argue, one to get a continuance, one to object, one to demur, two to research precedents, one to dictate a letter, one to stipulate, five to turn in their time cards, one to depose, one to write interrogatories, two to settle, one to order a secretary to change the bulb, and twenty-eight to bill for professional services.

Q: How many members of the England cricket team does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Four. One to change it after 85 overs, one to throw him the new one, one to drop it, and one to get caught rubbing something out of his pocket into more...

The University of Memphis reversed a long-standing policy banning beer from home football games. We suggest a new slogan: "Memphis Football: Finally Tolerable."

Two Cleveland Browns supporters were on their way to a game when a Greyhound bus accidentally dumped human waste on their car. Had they not been protected by the windshield, the shit most definitely would have hit the fans.

How many Buckeye football players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But he gets three hours credit.

A federal judge has sided with the Washington Redskins in a lawsuit regarding the team's name. Sadly, it's the first major victory the franchise has enjoyed since 1991.

Pacman Jones has signed a one-year deal to join the Winnipeg Blue Bombers in the CFL. Hopefully Jones can adjust to Canada's lack of firearms.

NFL commissioner Roger Goodell is doing well so far on his climb up Mt. Rainier in Washington. He's up so high, he passed Ricky Williams.