Foreplay Jokes / Recent Jokes
What's a man's idea of foreplay? -A half-hour of begging.
What is the Australian for foreplay? Brace yourself, Sheila! And the Welsh? Are you awake, Gwen?
What do you call foreplay in Alabama? 'Hey sis, you awake?'
After the big Super Bowl party, Doug figured he better spend some quality time with his wife. He climbs upstairs, walks in the bedroom and crawls into bed.
“Alright honey, ” he says, “Give me a play you want me to run. ”
“How about foreplay? ” his wife replies.
“What’s the foreplay? ” says Doug.
“You know, ” the wife says, “It happens before the two minute warning. ”
Signs Your Partner is - During foreplay, he's always double-clicking your G-spot. - His new computer includes a DVD-ROM drive, a 56k modem, and a tissue dispenser. - When she wants you to take off your pants, she says, "Scroll down." - Tells everyone he's a pioneer in "palm computing." - He's suing Playboy.com for repetitive stress injuries. - Her favorite actor? Tommy Lee. - When he sees a hot babe, he wryly says, "Boy, I'd like to click on her." - You look deep into his eyes and see a faint image of Asia Carrera burned into his corneas. - As you undress, he takes out his credit card and tells you his birthday. - During sex, he shouts, "Refresh! Refresh!" - His version of foreplay: You lie naked on the bed with a sheet covering you... he pulls it down slowly for ten minutes.
There was this couple in bed one night. The wife had curled up ready for sleep and the husband put his bed lamp on to read a book.
As he was reading, he stopped and reached over to his wife and started fondling her pussy.
He did this only for a very short while then stopped and went back to reading his book. The wife got up and started stripping off in front of him.
The husband was confused and asked,' 'What are doing taking all your jammies off?''
The wife replied,' 'You were playing with my pussy. I thought it was foreplay for something a bit heavier''.
The husband said,' 'No, not at all.''
The wife then asked,'' Well, what were you doing then?''
' 'I couldn't turn the pages of my book.''