Fun Jokes / Recent Jokes

The sweet young thing was telling her mother about the great time she had at the mountain resort: "I met a man in the recreation hall and we played Ping-Pong all afternoon. What fun, Mother!"
"Why, dear," remarked the mother, "I never knew you enjoyed Ping-Pong."
"I do now," the daughter said. "I'd hit the ball the wrong way and we'd both go after it under the table. Then he'd hit the ball the wrong way and we'd both go after it under the table. We played all afternoon. It was wonderful."
"But I don't understand," said the mother. "Where does the fun come in?"
"Under the table, silly."

This lady approaches a priest and tells him, "Father, I have a problem.
I have these two talking female parrots, but they only know how
to say one thing."
"What do they say?", the priest asked.
"They only know how to say `Hi, we are prostitutes. Do you want to
have some FUN?'"
"That's terrible!", the priest exclaimed, "But I have a solution to
your problem. Bring your two talking female parrots over to my house
and I
will put them with my two male talking parrots who I have taught to pray
and read the Bible, then my parrots will teach your parrots to stop
saying
that terrible phrase and your female parrots will learn to pray and
worship."
"Thank you," said the lady.
So the next day, the lady brings her female parrots to the priest's
house.
The priest's two male parrots are holding rosary beads
and praying in their cage.
The lady more...

Some fun things to do the next time you're on one of those long international flights to kill time...
Pinch the stewardess' butt as she passes.
When two people kiss in the in flight movie, belch real loud.
When there's any nudity, hoot really loudly for a few minutes.
Fart loudly and act shocked, looking around to see who did it.
Fiddle around with the emergency exit, then ask a fellow passenger if he has a crowbar.
Hijack the cockpit and, over the loudspeaker, announce that the first class passengers and luggage are to switch places.
Run down the aisle screaming, "He's got a bomb! He's got a bomb!".
Go into the bathroom and make rude bodily noises, then come out looking refreshed.

There was a reporter from the city stuck in a small mountainous town in W. Va. He decided to use the time by getting a good story to submit to his boss. He saw an old man sitting outside a local store and went over to begin the interview." Sir, I am writing a story about people in this area and would like to include an interesting story from you. Is there any particular story that you would like to share?" The old hillbilly smiled to himself as he thought back on a time. "Well, thar was the time I lost my sheep. We gathered up a bunch of the boys, got some moonshine in us and went off after it. When we found the sheep, we all took turns screwing it.... my, that was fun!"The reporter couldn't write a story about that so he asked for another." Well, when my neighbor's wife got lost, we all gathered up and got drunk and went out to look for her. We had a good time taking turns with her when we found her, too. Damn that was a lot of fun!"The reporter was more...

Top10 Reasons E-Mail is Like a Penis:
10. Those who have it would be devastated if it was ever cut off.
9. Those who have it think that those who don't are somehow inferior.
8. Those who don't have it may agree that it's neat, but think it's not worth the fuss that those who have it make about it.
7. Many of those who don't have it would like to try it, a phenomenon psychologists call "E-mail Envy."
6. It's more fun when it's up, but this makes it hard to get any real work done.
5. In the distant past, its only purpose was to transmit information vital to the survival of the species. Some people still think that's the only thing it should be used for, but most folks today use it mostly for fun.
4. If you don't take proper precautions, it can spread viruses.
3. We attach an importance to it that is far greater than its actual size and influence warrant.
2. If you're not careful what you do with it, it can get you into a lot of more...

A lady approaches her priest and tells him "Father, I have a problem. I have two female talking parrots, but they only know how to say one thing."

"What do they say?" the priest inquired.

"They only know how to say,' Hi, we're prostitutes. Want to have some fun?'"

"That's terrible!" the priest exclaimed, "but I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two female parrots over to my house and I will put them with my two male talking parrots whom I taught to pray and read the bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase and your female parrots will learn the joys of praise and worship."

"Thank you!" the woman responded.

The next day the woman brings her female parrots to the priest's house. His two male parrots are holding the rosary beads and praying in their cage. The lady puts her two female parrots in with the male parrots and the more...

Q: What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her more attractive?
A: Her ankles.
Q: What do you say to a Blonde that won't give in?
A: "Have another beer."
Q: What do Blondes say after sex?
A1: Thanks Guys.
A2: Are you boys all in the same band?
A3: Do you guys all play for the Green Bay Packers?
Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes twinkle?
A: Shine a flashlight in their ear.
Q: What does a screen door and a blonde have in common?
A: The more you bang it the looser it gets.
Q: What does a blond and a beer bottle have in common?
A: They're both empty from the neck up.
Q: What do blonds and spaghetti have in common?
A: They both wriggle when you eat them.
Q: Why was the blondes' belly button sore?
A: Because her boyfriend was blonde too.
Q: How do you get a blond out of a tree?
A: Wave
Q: What do peroxide blonds and black men have in common?
A: They both have black more...