Funnies Jokes / Recent Jokes

Q: What do they call Santa's helpers?
A: Subordinate Clauses
Q: What do you call Santa Clause after he's fallen into a fireplace?
A: Krisp Kringle
Q: Who sings "Love Me Tender," and makes Christmas toys?
A: Santa's little Elvis
Q: Which of Santa's reindeers needs to mind his manners the most?
A: "Rude"olph
Q: What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?
A: A cookie sheet
Q: What reindeer has the cleanest antlers?
A: Comet
Q: What is the cow's holiday greeting?
A: Mooooory Christmas
Q: What does Santa like to eat?
A: A jolly roll
Q: Where do Santa's reindeers like to stop for lunch?
A: Deery Queen
Q: What does Santa say when he is sick?
A: OH OH NO!
Q: If athletes get athlete's foot, what do astronauts get?
A: Missile toe
Q: How does Santa Claus take pictures?
A: With his North Pole-aroid.
Q: What do you call the fear of getting stuck while sliding down a chimney?
A: more...

Halloween Funnies:

What do Skeletons say before eating? Bone Appetite.

What do blondes and Jack-O-Lanterns have in common? Both have blank expressions and are hollow inside.

Why did the Vampire get fired from the Blood Bank? He was caught drinking on the job.

Why do ghosts have so much trouble dating? Women can see right through them.

Why are Vampires Democrats? They want Gore in
2000.

What kind of clothes do Zombies wear? Decay NY.

Why aren't there any famous skeletons? They're a bunch of no bodies.

What kind of music do Mummies listen to? Wrap.

What do you call a guy turned on by a witch? Scared stiff.