Gore Jokes / Recent Jokes
This joke is kind of dated but it's still funny.
Al Gore, Bill, Hilary, and Chelsea Clinton were all riding in the Airforce One. Out of the blue Gore says, "I could throw a hundred, one dollar bills out the window and make a hundred people happy." Bill says, "Well I could throw ten, ten dollar bills out the window, and make ten people very happy." Hilary, not wanting to be left out, says "Well I could throw one, one hundred dollar bill out the window and make one person extremely happy." Chelsea rolled her eyes and said "Well i could throw all three of you out the window and make the whole nation happy!"
Q: How do you spot Al Gore in a room full of secret service agents? A: He's the stiff one.
Bill Clinton, Hillary Ramrod Clinton, Al Gore, and Tipper Gore are flying aboard Air Force 1 on their way to visit the Communists to share their success stories about taxing Americans. Bill: "Why dont I throw this hundred dollar bill out the window and make someone very happy."Hillary: "Well, why dont you throw ten hundred dollar bills out the window and make ten people happy."Al: "Why dont you two jump out the window and make me and Tipper happy."Tipper: "Why dont we all jump out the window and make everybody throughout the United States and world happy."
"We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur."
-- Vice President Al Gore, 9/22/97
"For NASA, space is still a high priority."
-- Vice President Al Gore, 9/5/93
"Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children."
-- Vice President Al Gore
"The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation`s history. I mean in this century`s history. But we all lived in this century. I didn`t live in this century."
-- Vice President Al Gore, 9/15/95
"It isn`t pollution that`s harming the environment. It`s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
-- Vice President Al Gore
"[It`s] time for the human race to enter the solar system."
-- Vice President Al Gore
"We`re all capable of mistakes, but I do not care to enlighten you on the mistakes we may or may more...
"I am not part of the problem. I am a Democrat."
-- Vice President Al Gore
"A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls."
-- Vice President Al Gore
"Illegitimacy is something we should talk about in terms of not having it."
-- Vice President Al Gore, 5/20/996
"Democrats understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child."
-- Vice President Al Gore
"Welcome to President Clinton, Mrs. Clinton, and my fellow astronauts."
-- Vice President Al Gore
"Mars is essentially in the same orbit... Mars is somewhat the same distance from the Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe."
-- Vice President Al Gore
"What a waste it more...
Bumper stickers reportedly seen on cars around the DC area:
Clinton: We forgive you... Now Resign!
Al Gore: One heartthrob from the Presidency
Adultery is not a family value
Does character matter YET?
One More Whore And We Get Gore
Bill Clinton: Commander in Heat
My President Fooled Around with Your Honor Student
Jail to the Chief