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The Charade

The world's greatest charade player brags that he can guess any charade. A TV producer decides to use the charade player in a TV special. He issues a challenge offering the charade player a million dollars to guess a very hard charade on television. The Charade player agrees.

Comes the big night, all the world is watching. The charade player is sitting on stage in front of a curtain. Music blares and the curtain opens to reveal seven nude young women.

The second and fourth ladies are holding their breasts, while the other five have their backs to him and are baring their behinds.

The charade player barely glances over them and says,' 'The William Tell Overture by Rossini.''

The flabbergasted producer says in awe,' 'You've done it!. That's the right answer. You are indeed the greatest charade player!'' and hands him a check for a million bucks.

Walking out, a reporter stops the charade player and ask him how more...

Jimmy Carter said Iraq is one of the "greatest blunders that American presidents have ever made." Take that Democrats, Carter admitted that Bush is the greatest.

The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one.

Greatest Pain
One day, a man walked into the dentist"s office for some dental work.
The dentist said, "Sir, you have a tooth I must pull, What type of pain killer would you like?"
The man looked at the dentist and said, "None, thanks, I have experienced the second greatest pain in my life."
The dentist said, "Sir, pulling this tooth Will be painful, I suggest a painkiller."
The man looked back at the dentist and said, "I have experienced the second greatest pain in my life, Nothing else will ever compare."
The dentist said, "Sir, I"m telling you, use a painkiller."
The man again said to the dentist, "I have experienced the second greatest pain in my life, I do not need painkillers, now pull the tooth."
The dentist then said, "Okay, You asked for it, But first, tell me what was the second greatest pain in your life?"
The man said, "Yes, I remember it well. I more...

Three nuns on a train had been getting to know one
another and decided to tell each other what their
greatest sins were.
The first nun says, "My greatest sin is sex. Every year
I go out for a week and work as a prostitute. Of course,
I put all the money I earn into the poor box."
The second nun says, "My greatest sin is drinking. Every
year I take the money from the poor box and go out
drinking for a solid week."
The third just sits there quietly.
So the first nun says to her, "Come on, we've told you
our worst sins. Now you have to tell us yours."
The third nun says, "My greatest sin is that I gossip,
and I can't wait to get off this train."

Four friends whose careers were an architect, a surgeon, a politician and an anesthetist met regularly for a monthly discussion.

This month’s topic was whose profession was the oldest. The surgeon opened the discussion by stating that in the good book it says that the lord took a rib from Adam and created woman, that, my friends, requires the skill of a surgeon, the greatest of them all, so therefore it follows that my profession is the oldest.

Then the anesthetist looked at the surgeon and said my friend you have got it wrong, before surgery can take place the patient must be put to sleep, that requires the skills of an anesthetist, the greatest of them all so I claim that my profession is the oldest.

Then the architect looked at the surgeon and the anesthetist and countered them with the fact that before anything existed there was nothing but organized chaos, every thing had to be planned, blueprinted, and built, that my friends takes the skills of more...

After a venerable career of endless, stellar successes the greatest director who ever lived is in his prime and preparing for his most ambitious project ever when he unexpectedly dies and is called home to heaven. St. Peter meets him at the gate.

"So sorry about your untimely death," he tells the director. "But God himself has called you home. You see, God wants you to direct a movie for Him."

The great man is humbled, "God wants ME to direct a film?"

"Yes," St. Peter tells him. "And we've arranged to have the best of everything made available to you. For example, the script is by William Shakespeare."

The director is stunned, "An original screenplay by William Shakespeare?"

"Yes," St. Peter assures him, "And it's his greatest work ever."

"Wow!" says the Director, awe struck.

"Your Production Designer will be more...