Gross Jokes / Recent Jokes
Four gay guys walk into a gay bar and they find a problem. There's only one stool left.
One guy says "Lets flip for it"
But another says "No, Lets flip it over"
Three youngsters are having hot discussion, about whose father is the tallest one.
The first one said, "My father is just like statue of Liberty. Your hat will fall off if you look at him"
The second one does not want to loose the discussion. He added, "That's nothing! You can not see my father's hands, when he stands up and waves. They vanish in the clouds".
The third one, a born winner in the discussion, confidently added, "Did your father's hands feel something, when he was waving in the clouds?"
The second one replied confidently that he is going to win the discussion, "Why, certainly, he once told me his hands felt something up in the clouds and he tried to pull that."
The third one said, "That something was my father's under pant. He once complained that they are being pulled by someone while standing."
A man joins a very exclusive nudist colony. On his first day there he takes off his clothes and starts to wander around. A gorgeous petite blonde walks by and the man immediately gets an erection. The woman notices his erection, comes over to him and says, "Sir, did you call for me?" The man replies, "No, what do you mean?" She says, "You must be new here, let me explain. It's a rule here that if you get an erection it implies you called for me." Smiling she leads him to the side of the swimming pool, lies down on a towel, eagerly pulls him to her and happily lets him have his way with her.
The man continued to explore the colony's facilities. He enters the sauna and as he sat down he farted. Within a few minutes a huge, horrible, corpulent, hairy man lumbers out of the steam toward him. "Did you call for me?" says the hairy man. "No, what do you mean?" says the newcomer. "You must be new here," says the hairy man, more...
Two men were riding on a train. One of them had a bottle in his coat pocket, and the other one wanted it. Finally the train went through a dark tunnel and the man was able to take the bottle out and drink up all the "whisky" inside of it. Then he put it back into the other man's pocket. When the train came out of the tunnel, the man who owned the bottle took it out of his pocket, opened it up, and spit into it.
A husband and wife want to take golf lessons from a pro at a local country club. The man and woman meet the pro and head onto the driving range. The man goes up to hit first. He swings and hits the ball 100 yards. The golf pro says not bad.
Golf pro: "Now hold the club as firm as you hold your wife's breasts". The man follows instructions and hits the ball 300 yards.
The golf pro says "Excellent!" Now the woman takes her turn. Her ball goes 30 yards.
Golfpro: "Not bad, try holding the club like you hold your husbands dick." She swings and the ball goes 10 yards.
Golfpro: "Not bad, but now try taking the club out of your mouth and hit the ball."
Jack is one horny guy and is not sure what to do about it. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a five dollar bill. He walks down the steet to the local
brothal and knocks on the door. The madam opens the door and asks Jack what she can do for him.
"I'm really horny but I only have $5. What can you do for me?" Jack asks the madam. She looks over this fellow and tells him, "Don't worry we can take care of you. No problem". She leads Jack into this room where in the opposite corner is a chicken. Jack thinks about this a second and figures it can't be that bad. He gives the madam the $5 and she closes the door behind her.
Jack undresses and has the time of his live. When he's done he can't remember when he has had such a pleasurable experience.
One week later, and horny again, Jack has saved up $10. Being a satisfied customer he goes back to the same madam and asks what she can do for him for
$10. "Well for $10 we have special show", more...