Haikus Jokes

Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

Thought I'd try my luck
Leaping from couch to dresser.
You did not see that.

Or,

Thought I'd try my luck
Leaping from couch to dresser.
God, that fucking hurt.

All I have to do,
Is lay and show my tummy.
Putty in my paws.

Sorry, don't know why;
Must run at mach three til morn.
Run run run run run.

Catnip, finest bud -
Makes me swing at my sister.
Can't handle my high.

Snarling, giant beast
Cowers at my deadly claws.
Hmph! Dogs! Such pansies!

It's not my fault, see -
The plant wants me to eat it.
"I dare you," it said!

She can't see me. Soon
I shall pounce her wee brains out!
Wait for it...and NOW!

Watch this - I chirp, and
He picks me up without fail.
I trained him GREAT, huh?

Dude, haikus are fun!
Especially ones about
Tino and Mena.

Redneck Haikus
Beauty
Naked in repose
Silvery silhouette girls
Adorn my mud flaps
Remorse
A painful sadness
Cain't fit big screen TV through
Double-wide's front door
Mother and Child
Crusted in boogers
Stained with Kool-Aid, baby has face
Only Mama loves
Exuberance
Joyous, playful, bright
Trailer park girl rolls in puddle
Of old motor oil
Alone
Seeking solitude
Carl's ex-wife Tammy files fer
Restraining order
Desire
Damn, in that tube-top
You make me almost fergit
That you're my cousin
Impounded
Sixty-five dollars
And cyclone fence keeps me from
My El Camino
Offerings
Tonight we hunger
Grandma sent grocery money
To Robert Tilton
Drama
Set the VCR
Dukes of Hazard Marathon
Starts at 9 O'Clock
Deprived
In WalMart toy aisle
Wailing boy wants rasslin' doll
Mama whups his ass
No Signal
White noise, buzzing static
Call more...