Hence Jokes / Recent Jokes

In the last year of his service a certain babuji was made head of the cash section. He introduced a new system whereby his prior approval was required in writing before any purchases could be made. It worked so well that he decided to introduce the same system in his home.
One Sunday, his wife sent him a note saying that the children wanted to eat pakoras, hence a sum of Rs. 50 may kindly be sanctioned for purchasing oil, besan, paalak, etc. The husband recorded that oil and besan had become too costly and beyond the reach of a middle class family like theirs; hence the proposal was rejected.
Next Sunday his wife sent another note saying that she wanted to accompany her friends to a movie, hence an amount of Rs. 100 be kindly sanctioned for a cinema ticket and refreshments. The husband recorded that the pay of a government employee is almost finished by the 20th of the month and it being the last Sunday of the month, there was no money left with him. The proposal may be more...

Human = eat + sleep + work + enjoy
Pigs = eat + sleep
Hence, Human = Pigs + work + enjoy
If, Human - enjoy = Pigs + work
In other words,
Human that don't know enjoy = pigs that work
Men = eat + sleep + earn money
Pigs = eat + sleep
Hence, Men = Pigs + earn money
If Men - earn money = Pigs
In other words,
Men that don't earn money = Pigs
Women = eat + sleep + spend
Pigs = eat + sleep
Hence,
Women = Pigs + spend
If, Women - spend = Pigs
In other words,
Women that don't spend = Pigs
Summary:
Men earn money not to let women become pigs!
Women spend not to let men become pigs!
Men + Women = 2 Pigs
Wish all the pigs to be happy forever.. .. thats Maths!!!

Three dead bodies of Indian politicians turn up at the mortuary, all with very big smiles on their faces. The medical examiner calls the police to show them what has happened. A Detective Inspector is sent and is taken to the first body.
"He was a BJP leader, 65 years of age, died of heart failure whilst making love to his mistress. Hence the enormous smile, Inspector," says the medical examiner.
The Detective Inspector is taken to the second dead man.
"He was a minister from ruling Congress party, was 70, made a pile from government funds, and spent it all on whiskey. Died of alcohol poisoning, hence the smile."
"Nothing unusual here", thinks the Inspector, and asks to be shown the last body.
"Ah," says the medical examiner. "This is the most unusual one. MP from Bihar, 60, struck by lightning."
"Why is he smiling then?' inquires the Inspector.
To which the medical officer replies, "He thought he more...

Three dead bodies turn up at the mortuary, all with very big smiles on their faces. The Coroner calls the Police Inspector to tell him what happened.
"First body: Frenchman, 60, died of heart failure whilst making love to his mistress. Hence the enormous smile, Inspector," says the Coroner.
"Second body: Scotsman, 25, won a thousand pounds in the lottery, spent it all on whiskey. Died of alcohol poisoning, hence the enormous smile."
The Inspector asks, "What about the third body?"
"Ah," says the Coroner, "this is the most unusual one. Billy-Bob, the redneck from Alabama, 30, struck by lightning while bass fishing."
"Why is he smiling then?" inquires the Inspector.
"Thought he was having his picture taken."

Three dead bodies turn up at the mortuary, all with very big
smiles on their faces. The coroner calls the police to show
them what's happened.
A Detective Inspector is sent and is taken straight to the first body.
"Englishman, 60, died of heart failure whilst making love to his mistress.
Hence the enormous smile Inspector", says the Coroner.
The DI is taken to the second dead man. "Scotsman, 25, won a
thousand pounds on the lottery, spent it all on whisky. Died of
alcohol poisoning, hence the smile."
" Nothing unusual here", thinks the DI, and asks to be shown
the last body. "Ah," says the coroner, "this is the most unusual one.
Irishman, 30, struck by lightning."
"Why is he smiling then?" inquires the Inspector. To which the coroner
replies: "Thought he was having his picture taken,".

Next time you're washing your hands and the water temperature isn't justhow you like it, think about how things used to be. Here are some facts about the 1500s.
Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May and still smelled pretty good by June. However, they were starting to smell, so brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odour.
Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children - last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it. Hence the saying, "Don't throw the baby out with the bath water."
Houses had thatched roofs - thick straw - piled high, with no wood underneath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the dogs, cats and other small animals (mice, bugs) lived in the roof. When it rained it became slippery and more...