Hitting Jokes

These are stories from help desks around the country.

At 3: 37 a. m. on a Sunday, I had just looked at the clock to determine my annoyance level, when I received a frantic phone call from a new user of a Macintosh Plus. She had gotten her entire family out of the house and was calling from her neighbor's. She had just received her first system error and interpreted the picture of the bomb on the screen as a warning that the computer was going to blow up.

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Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Customer: "Ok."
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
Customer: "Sure, you told me to write' click' and I more...

What does a redneck call hitting a deer at 65 mph?
- Fast food.

The Chicago Cubs signed Rudy Jaramillo to be their new hitting coach. Jaramillo took the job because he likes a challenge, and felt world peace was just too easy.

To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

The housewife answered a knock on the door and found a total stranger standing on the doorstep. Excuse me for disturbing you, maam, he said politely, but I pass your house every morning on my way to work, and Ive noticed that every day you appear to be hitting your son on the head with a loaf of bread! Thats right. Every day you wallop him on the head with a loaf of bread, and yet this morning you were hitting him with a chocolate cake....? Well, today is his birthday!