Honest Jokes / Recent Jokes

What do you call an honest lawyer?
An oxymoron.

A lawyer named Strange died, and his friend asked the tombstone maker to inscribe on his tombstone, "Here lies Strange, an honest man, and a lawyer."

The inscriber insisted that such an inscription would be confusing, for passersby would tend to think that three men were buried under the stone. However he suggested an alternative:

He would inscribe, "Here lies a man who was both honest and a lawyer.
That way, whenever anyone walked by the tombstone and read it, they would be certain to remark: "That's Strange"!

This test has only one question, but it's a very important one.
By giving an honest answer, you will discover where you stand morally.The test features an unlikely, completely fictional situation in which you will have to make a decision. Remember that your answer needs to be honest, yet spontaneous.Please scroll down slowly and give due consideration to each line.You are in Florida, Miami to be specific.
There is chaos all around you, caused by a hurricane, with severe flooding.
This is a flood of biblical proportions.
You are a photo journalist working for a major newspaper, and you are caught in the middle of this epic disaster.
The situation is nearly hopeless.
You're trying to shoot career-making photos.
There are houses and people swirling around you, some disappearing under the water.
Nature is unleashing all of its destructive fury.
Suddenly you see a woman in the water.
She is fighting for her life, trying not to be taken down with the more...

This test only has one question, but it's a very important one. By giving an honest answer you will be able to find out where you stand morally.
The test features an unlikely fictional situation, in which you will have to make a decision one way or the other. Remember that your answer needs to be completely honest and spontaneous. From the gut.
Please scroll down slowly and consider the scenario carefully. This is important for the test to work accurately.
You're a freelance photographer in Florida. You are caught in a great disaster. A hurricane has caused great chaos and severe flooding. There are huge masses of water swirling around you but you somehow manage to crawl to safety on the roof of a building. The situation is nearly horrifying. But you're trying to shoot some photographs of what you see.
There are houses and people being swept away by the raging waters, certainly to be swallowed up forever. Nature is showing all its destructive power, claiming everything more...

A lawyer named Impos Syble was shopping for a tombstone. After he had made his selection, the stonecutter asked him what inscription he would like on it.
"Here lies an honest man and a lawyer," responded the lawyer.
"Sorry, but I can't do that," replied the stonecutter. "In this state, it's against the law to bury two people in the same grave. However, I could put 'here lies an honest lawyer'."
"But that won't let people know who it is!" protested the lawyer.
"Sure it will," retorted the stonecutter. "People will read it and exclaim, "That's impossible!"

A lawyer named Impos Syble was shopping for a tombstone. After he had made his selection, the stonecutter asked him what inscription he would like on it. "Here lies an honest man and a lawyer," responded the lawyer. "Sorry, but I can't do that," replied the stonecutter. "In this state, it's against the law to bury two people in the same grave. However, I could put 'here lies an honest lawyer'." "But that won't let people know who it is!" protested the lawyer. "Sure it will," retorted the stonecutter. "People will read it and exclaim, "That's impossible!"

A lawyer named Strange died, and his friend asked the tombstone maker to inscribe on his tombstone, "Here lies Strange, an honest man, and a lawyer."
The inscriber insisted that such an inscription would be confusing, for passersby would tend to think that three men were buried under the stone.
However he suggested an alternative: He would inscribe, "Here lies a man who was both honest and a lawyer." That way, whenever anyone walked by the tombstone and read it, they would be certain to remark:
"That's Strange!"