Host Jokes / Recent Jokes

One night, at a party, The host asked his guests:
"How many here believe in ghosts?"
Everyone put up their hand.
"How many have seen ghosts?"
A lot of people put up their hand.
"How many have touched a ghost?"
Five people put up their hands
"How many have had sex with a ghost?"
One person put up their hand.
"Well then," said the host, "why don't you come up here and tell us all about it."
The man walked up.
"So, how was your night with the ghost?" asked the host.
"Ghost?" Said the man, "Sorry, I thought you said goat."

One night, at a party, The host asked his guests:"How many here believe in ghosts?" Everyone put up their hand."How many have seen ghosts?"A lot of people put up their hand."How many have touched a ghost?"Five people put up their hands"How many have had sex with a ghost?"One person put up their hand."Well then," said the host, "why don't you come up here and tell us all about it."The man walked up."So, how was your night with the ghost?" asked the host."Ghost?" Said the man, "Sorry, I thought you said goat."

A bloke went to his mate's fancy dress party with nothing but a young woman on his back. "So what the hell are you supposed to be?" the host asked.

"I'm a snail." The bloke replied.

"What a load of crap!" the host spat. "How can you be a snail when all you've got is that young woman on your back?"

"You've got it wrong, mate," the bloke replied. "That's Michelle".

One night, at a party, The host asked his guests:"How many here believe in ghosts?" Everyone put up their hand." How many have seen ghosts?" A lot of people put up their hand." How many have touched a ghost?" Five people put up their hands"How many have had sex with a ghost?" One person put up their hand." Well then," said the host, "why don't you come up here and tell us all about it." The man walked up." So, how was your night with the ghost?" asked the host." Ghost?" Said the man, "Sorry, I thought you said goat."

A hunter visited another hunter and was given a tour of his home. In the den was a stuffed lion.
The visiting hunter asked, "When did you bag him?"
The host said, "That was three years ago, when I went hunting with my wife."
"What's he stuffed with?" asked the visiting hunter, and the host said, "My wife."

There was a guy who was struggling to decide what to wear to go to a fancy costume party.
Then he had a bright idea.
When the host answered the door, he found the guy standing there with no shirt and no socks on... just a pair of pants.
"What the hell are you supposed to be?" asked the host.
"A premature ejaculation." said the man - "I just came in my pants!"

Spanish singer Julio Iglesias was on television with British TV host Anne Diamond when he used the word' manyana'. Diamond asked him to explain what it meant. He said that the term means "maybe the job will be done tomorrow, maybe the next day, maybe the day after that. Perhaps next week, next month, next year. Who cares?" The host turned to Irishman Shay Brennan who was also on the show and asked him if there was an equivalent term in Irish. "No. In Ireland we don't have a word to describe that degree of urgency.", replied Brennan.