Hundreds Jokes

The Lone Ranger and Tonto are riding through one of the manycanyons when suddenly rising from the hill on their right are hundreds ofindians. They start to spur their horse forward when they realised that thereare hundreds of indians ahead of them. Wheeling to the left they, onceagain, see hundreds of indians rising from the hill. They begin to back awayin the direction from which they had come and they realise, they weresurrounded. The indians had spread out. They were trapped. The Lone Ranger turns to Tonto, his life long friend, and says "Tonto, my firend, I think I must say that I have treasured our times togetherbut now I think we are doomed"." We?" replied Tonto "What's all this we, Paleface?"

Here's something I got (appropriately) over the net from someone,
who got it from someone, who in turn got it from somebody else. I
have no idea who originally wrote it.
"Think of the Internet as a highway."
There it is again. Some clueless fool talking about the "Information
Superhighway." They don't know didley about the net. It's nothing
like a superhighway. That's a rotten metaphor.
Suppose the metaphor ran in the other direction. Suppose the highways
were like the net...
A highway hundreds of lanes wide. Most with pitfalls for potholes.
Privately operated bridges and overpasses. No highway patrol. A
couple of rent-a-cops on bicycles with broken whistles. 500 member
vigilante posses with nuclear weapons. A minimum of 237 on ramps at
every intersection. No signs. Wanna get to Ensenada? Holler out
the window at a passing truck to ask directions. Ad hoc traffic
laws. Some lanes would vote to make use by a more...

There's this man, a devout catholic, who really wants to meet the pope. When the pope comes to his town on his world tour, the man puts on his finest Armani suit and goes down to see him.
Well, there are hundreds and hundreds of well dressed people, but the pope walks right up to this one especially shabby guy. The guy is clearly a homeless person, unshaven, smelly and dressed in rags. The pope leans over and has a conversation with the guy.
Well, our hero notices this, and he realizes there is no way that he can possibly be noticed in the sea of Armani suits, so he ducks into a bathroom, shreds his clothing and makes himself up to be equally shabby.
Sure enough, when he comes out the pope comes right over to him, leans over and says, "I thought I told you to get the hell out of here."

The Lone Ranger and Tonto are riding through one of the many canyons, when suddenly rising from the hill on their right are hundreds of Indians. They start to spur their horse forward, when they realized that there are hundreds of Indians ahead of them. Wheeling to the left they, once again, see hundreds of Indians rising from the hill. They begin to back away in the direction from which they had come and they realize they were surrounded.

The Indians had spread out and they were trapped. The Lone Ranger turns to Tonto, his life long friend, and says,' Tonto, my friend, I think I must say that I have treasured our times together, but now I think we are doomed.'

'We?' replied Tonto.' What's all this' we' crap, Paleface?'

A guy met a gorgeous girl in a nightclub and after talking for awhile, she invited him back to her place for the night.
When they arrived at her apartment, she took him right into the bedroom. As he looked around, he noticed the room was packed with stuffed animals. There were hundreds of small ones on the bottom shelf of a very large bookcase. The middle shelf held hundreds more medium-sized ones, and the top shelf a huge collection of giant ones.
He was surprised to see that anyone would have such an extensive collection of stuff animals, but decided not to mention it to her.
After hours of lovemaking, he turned to her and asked, "So, tell me, how was I?"
"You can pick any prize from the bottom shelf," she replied.