Insurance Jokes / Recent Jokes

A North Carolina man, having bought several expensive cigars, insured them against... get this... fire.
After he had smoked them, he then decided that he had a claim against the insurance company and filed.
The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious reason that the man had consumed the cigar normally. The man sued.
The judge stated that since the company had insured the cigars against fire, they were obligated to pay.
After the man accepted payment for his claim, the company then had him arrested... for arson...

Why do men pay more than women for car insurance? Because women don't get blowjobs while they're driving.

A woman, searching for a job, inquired about the benefits. The Personnel Manager informed her they had group health and life insurance, but the costs were deducted from the employee's pay.She said, "My last employer had full health coverage, as well as five year's salary for life insurance and a month's sick leave AND they paid the full premiums.""I can't help but ask why you would leave a job with such benefits,"
the interviewer replied.The woman shrugged her shoulders and said, "The company went bankrupt."

body: The man replied " I don't have a computer, neither an email" I'm sorry, said the HR manager, if you don't have an email, that means you do not exist. And who doesn't exist, cannot have the job. The man left with no hope at all.
He didn't know what to do, with only 10US$ in his pocket. He then decided to go to the supermarket and buy a 10 Kg tomato crate. He then sold the tomatoes in a door to door round. In less than two hours, He succeeded to double his capital. He repeated the operation three times, and returned home with 60 US$. The man realized that he can survive by this way, and
started to go everyday earlier, and return late.
Thus, his money doubles or triples every day. Shortly later, he bought a cart, then a truck, then he had his own fleet of delivery vehicles. 5 years later, the man is one of the biggest food retailers in the U. S.
He started to plan his family's future, and decided to have a life insurance. He called an insurance broker, more...

Three Insurance salesman were sitting in a restaurant boasting about each companies service.
The first one said, "When one of our insureds died suddenly on Monday, we got the news that evening and were able to process the claim for the wife and had mailed a check on Wednesday evening."
The second one said, "When one of our insured died without warning on Monday, we learned of it in 2 hours and were able to hand-deliver a check the same evening."
The last salesman said, "That's nothing. Our office is on the 20th floor of the World Trade Center, Tower 1. One of our insured who was washing a window on the 85th floor, slipped and fell. We handed him his check as passed our floor."

Form Feed
Insurance form question and answer about a recent accident:
Q: Could either driver have done anything to avoid the accident? A: I could have traveled by bus.
A man collided with a cow and completed the requested form as follows: Q: What warning did you give the other party before the collision? A: Horn
Q: What warning was given by the other party? A: Moo

A lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean. The lawyer said, “I'm
here because my house burned down, and everything I owned was destroyed by the fire. The insurance company paid for everything.”“That's quite a coincidence,” said the engineer. “I'm here because my house and
all my belongings were destroyed by a flood, and my insurance company also paid for everything.”The lawyer looked somewhat confused. “How do you start a flood?”" he asked.