Interesting Jokes / Recent Jokes

Interesting things about Monica Lewinsky: - Nobody would know about her if it weren't for Bill - She sucks - She blows - She's bloated - She's the focus of a huge legal battle - She'll go down in a heartbeat Who does she think she is, Microsoft Windows?

Cute and interesting are two different things.

The facts, although interesting, are irrelevant.

A senile old man started walking through town everyday in hopes of seeing interesting new things...
On the first day, he saw a restaurant offering elephant ear sandwiches. He said to himself, "That's interesting. I'll go back home now."
The next day, he walked along and suddenly found a dog that swallowed a cow in one gulp. "That's enough for today", he said.
The very next day, he heard strangely melodic, low pitched music. He slowly walked around the corner and found a tenor sax player practicing. He said to himself, "okay Harold, you need to go home now. Too much excitement has you hallucinating!"

I am reading a very interesting book about anti-gravity...I just can't put it down.

There were three men. Joe, Rich, and Scott.
They were all camping in the woods, and they knew they had to stop for
the
night. Joe suggested they stop where they were right there, a nice
clear,
wooded area. Rich agreed, but Scott disagreed, because there was nothing
interesting around, only trees.
They kept hiking for a little longer, and came across a small clear area,
right next to the highway. Both Joe and Rich wanted to saty there because
there was no stumps, or moss around, and the sounds of the cars could
help
to put them asleep. Scott said no, because he found a small ant farm 500
meters away, and was scared the ants might come, and get them.
SO they kept hiking, and finally, they came to the end of the woods, and
stepped onto the highway. Scott was mystified, and wanted to sleep right
smack dab in the middle of the highway. It was interesting, and he wanted
to look at all the different liscence plates, as they more...

By Barbara Florio Graham
From McCall's, June, 1983

I read every diet I can get my hands on. I even follow their suggestions. But eventually, inevitably, I always get fat again. Now, at last, I've found The Answer. After living for almost 14 years with a man who never gains an ounce no matter what I serve him, I've found out what it is that keeps him thin: He thinks differently. The real difference between fat and thin people is that thin people:

avoid eating popcorn in the movies because it gets their hands greasy;

split a large combination pizza with three friends;

think Oreo cookies are for kids;

nibble cashews one at a time;

think that doughnuts are indigestible;

read books they have to hold with both hands;

become so absorbed in a weekend project they forget to have lunch;

fill the candy dish on their desks with paper clips;

counteract the midafternoon slump with a more...