Interviewer Jokes / Recent Jokes

NASA was interviewing professionals to be sent to Mars. Only one could go and couldn? t return to Earth.
The first applicant, an engineer, was asked how much he wanted to be paid for going. “A million dollars, ” he answered, “because I want to donate it to M. I. T. ”
The next applicant, a doctor, was asked the same question. He asked for $2 million. “I want to give a million to my family, ” he explained, “and leave the other million for the advancement of medical research. ”
The last applicant was a lawyer. When asked how much money he wanted, he whispered in the interviewer? s ear, “Three million dollars. ”
“Why so much more than the others? ” asked the interviewer.
The lawyer replied, “If you give me $3 million, I? ll give you $1 million, I? ll keep $1 million, and we? ll send the engineer to Mars. ”

Personnel executives of 100 major corporations were asked for stories of unusual behavior by job applicants.
10. "... stretched out on the floor to fill out the job application."
9. "She wore a Walkman and said she could listen to me and the music at the same time."
8. "? A balding candidate abruptly excused himself. Returned to office a few minutes later, wearing a hairpiece."
7. "... asked to see interviewer's resume to see if the personnel executive was qualified to judge the candidate."
6. "... announced she hadn't had lunch and proceeded to eat a hamburger and french fries in the interviewer's office - wiping the ketchup on her sleeve"
5. "Interrupted to phone his therapist for advice on answering specific interview questions."
4. "When I asked him about his hobbies, he stood up and started tap dancing around my office."
3. "... pulled out a Polaroid camera and snapped a more...

Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Person asked a young engineer who was fresh out of MIT,' What starting salary were you thinking about?' The Engineer said,' In the neighborhood of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package.' The interviewer said,' Well, what would you say to a package of 5 weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years - say, a red Corvette?' The Engineer sat up straight and said,' Wow! Are you kidding?' The interviewer replied,' Yeah, but you started it.'

Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources person asked a young applicant fresh out of Business School, "And what starting salary are you looking for?" The applicant said, "Around $125, 000 a year, depending on the benefits package,'','' The interviewer said, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every two years - say, a red Corvette?"

The applicant sat up straight and said, "Wow! Are you kidding?"

And the interviewer replied, "Yeah, but you started it."

Reaching the end of a job interview, the human resources person askeda young engineer fresh out of MIT, "And what starting salary were youlooking for?" The engineer said, "In the neighborhood of $125, 000 a year, dependingon the benefits package." The interviewer said, "Well, what would you say to a package of5-weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, companymatching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leasedevery 2 years - say, a red Corvette?" The Engineer sat up straight and said, "Wow! Are you kidding?" And the interviewer replied, "Yeah, but you started it."

Job Interview Quotations Vice Presidents and personnel directors of the one hundred largest corporations were asked to describe their most unusual experience interviewing prospective employees. A job applicant challenged the interviewer to an arm wrestle. Interviewee wore a Walkman, explaining that she could listen to the interviewer and the music at the same time. Candidate fell and broke arm during interview. Candidate announced she hadn't had lunch and proceeded to eat a hamburger and french fies in the interviewers office. Candidate explained that her long-term goals was to replace the interviewer. Candidate said he never finished high school because he was kidnapped and kept in a closet in Mexico. Balding Candidate excused himself and returned to the office a few minutes later wearing a headpiece. Applicant said if he was hired he would demonstrate his loyalty by having the corporate logo tattooed on his forearm. Applicant interrupted interview to phone her therapist for advice more...

This is a portion of a radio interview between a Female Broadcaster and a Military Man, who was about to sponsor a Boy Scout Troop visiting his military installation.
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: So, Sir, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your base?
MILITARY MAN: We're going to teach them climbing, canoeing, archery and shooting.
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Shooting! That's a bit irresponsible, isn't it?
MILITARY MAN: I don't see why, they'll be properly supervised on the rifle range.
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Don't you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children?
MILITARY MAN: I don't see how. We will be teaching them proper rifle discipline before they even touch a firearm.
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: But you're equipping them to become violent killers.
MILITARY MAN: Well, you're equipped to be a prostitute, but you're not one, are you?
THE RADIO WENT SILENT.
INTERVIEW ENDED.