Jiggy Jokes

Midlife is when you go to the doctor and you realize you are now so old you have to pay someone to look at you naked.
The good news about midlife is that the glass is still half-full... of course, the bad news is that it won't be long before your teeth are floating in it.
Midlife women no longer have upper arms, we have wingspans... we are no longer women in sleeveless shirts, we are flying squirrels in drag.
You know you are getting old when you go for a mammogram and you realize it is the only time someone will ask you to appear topless in film.
Midlife is when you bounce (a lot), but you don't bounce back. (It's more like Splat!)
Midlife brings the wisdom that life throws you curves... and that you're now sitting on your biggest ones.
It's very hard to "get jiggy with it" in midlife... jiggly, yes; jiggy, no.
Midlife is when your 1970s Body-by-Jake now includes Legs-by-Rand McNally. (more red and blue lines than an accurately scaled map of the more...

Mid-life is when you go to the doctor and you realize you are now so old, you have to pay someone to look at you naked.

Mid-life women no longer have upper arms, we have wingspans. .. we are no longer women in sleeveless shirts, we are flying squirrels in drag.

Mid-life has hit you when you stand naked in front of a mirror and can see your rear end without turning around.

You know you are getting old when you go for a mammogram and you realize it is the only time someone will ask you to appear topless in film.

You know you've crossed the mid-life threshold when you're in the grocery store and you hear a Muzak version of "Stairway to Heaven" in the produce department.

Mid-life is when you bounce (a lot), but you don't bounce back. (It's more like Splat!)

Mid-life brings the wisdom that life throws you curves... and that you're now sitting on your biggest ones.

It's very hard to "get jiggy with more...

Midlife is when you go to the doctor and you realize you are now so old, you have to pay someone to look at you naked.

The good news about midlife is that the glass is still half-full..of course, the bad news is that it won't be long before your teeth are floating in it.

Midlife women no longer have upper arms, we have wingspans..we are no longer women in sleeveless shirts, we are flying squirrels in drag.

Midlife has hit you when you stand naked in front of a mirror and can see your rear end without turning around.

You know you are getting old when you go for a mammogram and you realize it is the only time someone will ask you to appear topless in film.

You know you've crossed the midlife threshold when you're in the grocery store and you hear a Muzak version of "Stairway to Heaven" in the produce department.

Midlife is when you bounce (a lot), but you don't bounce back. (It's more like more...

Midlife is when you go to the doctor and you realize you are now so old, you have to pay someone to look at you naked.

The good news about midlife is that the glass is still half-full.. of course, the bad news is that it won't be long before your teeth are floating in it.

Midlife women no longer have upper arms, we have wingspans.. we are no longer women in sleeveless shirts, we are flying squirrels in drag.

Midlife has hit you when you stand naked in front of a mirror and can see your rear end without turning around.

You know you are getting old when you go for a mammogram and you realize it is the only time someone will ask you to appear topless in film.

You know you've crossed the midlife threshold when you're in the grocery store and you hear a Muzak version of "Stairway to Heaven" in the produce department.

Midlife is when you bounce (a lot), but you don't bounce back. (It's more like more...

Midlife is when you go to the doctor and you realize you are now so old, you have to pay someone to look at you naked.

Midlife women no longer have upper arms, we have wingspans... we are no longer women in sleeveless shirts, we are flying squirrels in drag.

Midlife has hit you when you stand naked in front of a mirror and can see your rear end without turning around.

You know you are getting old when you go for a mammogram and you realize it is the only time someone will ask you to appear topless in film.

You know you've crossed the midlife threshold when you're in the grocery store and you hear a Muzak version of "Stairway to Heaven" in the produce department.

Midlife is when you bounce (a lot), but you don't bounce back.(It's more like Splat!)

Midlife brings the wisdom that life throws you curves... and that you're now sitting on your biggest ones.

It's very hard to "get jiggy with it" more...