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1971. Tom Workman, former NBA-ABA basketball player: "They tell you to join the NBA and see all the big cities: New York with all the lights, San Francisco with its nightlife, San Diego's sunshine. They also say join the ABA and see the U.S.A. Unfortunately, I found this included Steubenville, Ohio; Amarillo, Texas; Elko, Nevada; Cedar City, Utah; and Biloxi, Mississippi."
1966. Jim Camp, George Washington football coach, on why he doesn't use a lonely end: "We train by a parkway, which runs beside a river. If we had a lonely end, he either would be hit by a car or drown."
1976. Hugh Campbell, football coach at Whitworth College in Spokane, Wash., after his team had defeated Whitman 70-30: "It wasn't as easy as you think. It's hard to stay awake that long."
1991. Frank Layden, Utah Jazz president, on a former player: "I told him, 'Son, what is it with you. Is it ignorance or apathy?' He said, 'Coach, I don't know and I don't more...

My Christmas Wish
If I had 1 wish this Christmas, it would be for all the children of the
world to join together in peace and love and sing in harmony.
If I had 2 wishes this Christmas, it would be for
1. All the Children of the world to sing together
2. $1, 000, 000 tax free
If I had 3 wishes this Christmas
1. Kids singing together
2. $1, 000, 000 tax free per year for life
3. To have all encompassing power over the universe
If I had 4 wishes this Christmas
1. The crap about the kids
2. $1, 000, 000
3. All encompassing power
4. 1 extended orgasm to last 30 days, brought about by 2 super models
and, of course, my spouse
Let's face it, the logistics of getting all those kids together is impossible.
So, let's rearrange
1. All encompassing power
2. The orgasm
3. The money
OHHH!! I forgot to strike down my enemies. Okay, so we add that in.
Now.. My wish this Christmas would more...