Jungle Jokes / Recent Jokes

A farmer went lookin 4 his goat in the jungle. In the same jungle there was this couple doing it.
The guys yells out, "What a nice bush!", and the farmer hollers back, "Would you mind checking if my goat is in that bush?"

Once upon a time, long, long ago there were two unique lions in the jungles of Africa. Both, it seems, had human-like qualities that made them claim territory, daring the other to cross over the line. Strange as it seems, the boundary between their turf was a well traveled trail through the jungle.All day every day, both lions lay in the brush staring across the trail at their compatriot, daring him to cross into their territory.The local natives knew of this animal feud, but all this was unbeknown to African Jack, a well-known and must publicized guide who did not speak Lionese and was unfamiliar with the territory.While he was leading a safari through the jungle, walking all day and cutting vines with their machetes, all this constant hacking brush had them worn to a frazzle. After seeing two or three of his safari drop from exhaustion, African Jack decided to stop on the trail between these two lions and camp for the night.After sitting up camp, eating, and getting his safari more...

There were three female explorers who decided that they would go explore the African jungle together. One blonde, one brunnette and one redhead.
They were near the middle of the jungle when a rare African tribe surrounded them. The tribe said that the gods have sent them evil things and the explorers shall be destroyed. The tribe was going to shoot them with a bow and arrow in the head one at a time.
First they were going to shoot at the brunnette. She stepped up and they called, "1-2-3", but before they could shoot she yelled, "TORNADO!", and everyone ducked and lay down on the ground and the brunnette ran way while they ducked. The tribe got mad and swore but did not go after her.
Then the redneck stepped up and they aimed and yelled, "1-2-3", but before they could shoot she screeched, "FLOOD!", and everyone jumped and climbed up the nearest tree. The redhead took advantage and ran away. They got really mad and swore but did not go more...

There were three female explorers who decided that they would go explore the African jungle together. One blonde, one brunnette and one redhead. They were near the middle of the jungle when a rare african tribe surrounded them. The tribe said that the gods have sent them evil things and the explorers shall be poo head destroyed. The tribe was going to shoot them with a bow and arrow in the not head one at a time. First they were going to shoot at the brunnette. She stepped up and they called 1-2-3 but before they could shoot she yelled TORNADO and everyone ducked and lay down on the ground and the brunnette ran way while they ducked. The tribe got mad and swore but did not go after her. Then the redneck stepped up and they aimed and yelled 1-2-3.. but before they could shoot she screeched FLOOD and everyone jumped and climbed up the nearest tree. The redhead took advantage and ran away. They got really mad and swore but did not go after her. They didn't like people yelling fake more...

There were three female explorers who decided that they would go explore the African jungle together. One blonde, one brunnette and one redhead.
They were near the middle of the jungle when a rare african tribe surrounded them. The tribe said that the gods have sent them evil things and the explorers shall be destroyed. The tribe was going to shoot them with a bow and arrow in the head one at a time.
First they were going to shoot at the brunnette. She stepped up and they called 1-2-3 but before they could shoot she yelled TORNADO and everyone ducked and lay down on the ground and the brunnette ran way while they ducked. The tribe got mad and swore but did not go after her.
Then the redneck stepped up and they aimed and yelled 1-2-
3.. but before they could shoot she screeched FLOOD and everyone jumped and climbed up the nearest tree. The redhead took advantage and ran away. They got really mad and swore but did not go after her.
They didn't like people yelling more...

A lion woke up one morning feeling really rowdy and mean. He went out and cornered a small monkey and roared,' Who is mightiest of all jungle animals?' The trembling monkey says,' You are, mighty lion!' Later, the lion confronts a wildebeest and fiercely bellows,' Who is the mightiest of all jungle animals?' The terrified wildebeest stammers,' Oh great lion, you are by far the mightiest animal in the jungle!' On a roll now, the lion swaggers up to an elephant and roars,' Who is the mightiest of all jungle animals?' Fast as lightning, the elephant snatches up the lion with his trunk, slams him against a tree half a dozen times, making the lion feeling like it'd been run over by a safari wagon. The elephant then stomped on the lion until it looked like a corn tortilla and then ambled away. The lion let out a moan of pain, lifted his head weakly and hollered after the elephant,' Geez, just because you don't know the answer, you don't have to get so pissed off!'

Three animals in a bar was having a huge argument over who was the best.
The first animal, a hawk, claimed that because of his ability to fly, he could attack anything repeatedly from above, and his prey had hardly a chance.
The second, a lion, based his claim on his strength. No one in the jungle dared to challenge him, King of the Jungle.
The third, a skunk, insisted he needed neither flight nor strength to frighten off any creature with his unique arsenal.
As the three debated the issue, a grizzly bear came along and swallowed them all; hawk, lion and stinker!