Kirstie Alley Jokes / Recent Jokes

Chocolate maker Nestle announced Monday that it will purchase weight loss product maker Jenny Craig Inc. for $600 million.

The large investment is an attempt to further Nestle’s health and wellness programs, as well as the latest chess move in a continuing effort by big business to ensure that Jenny Craig spokeswoman Kirstie Alley remains fat.

Turns out even less separates man from monkey. Research shows chimps know the difference between five chocolates and four. A pint and a quart. But, apparently, they couldn’t tell the difference between Kirstie Alley and a manatee.

As a bonus, they also clean out your refrigerator and pantry.

A white, frigid mass that keeps getting bigger and bigger--scientists have named the glacier Kirstie Alley.

Kirstie Alley was identified as the alleged killer in a crime spree in Florida. The remaining four suspects in the line up were allowed to return to their tanks in SeaWorld.