Laura Jokes / Recent Jokes

NICKNAMES If Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose. If Mike, Charlie, Bob and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.EATING OUT When the bill arrives, Mike, Charlie, Bob and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller, and none will actually admit they want change back. When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.MONEY A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't want.BATHROOMS A man has six items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Holiday Inn. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.ARGUMENTS A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new more...

In response to the request for "kids growing up" stories, here's one
told to me many years ago by some friends about their five-year-old
daughter Laura. The mother calls it "The Kevin Incident." The father
just says, "Like Mother, Like Daughter."
It seems that Laura came home from Nursery School one day and
announced that Kevin had pee-peed in the yard. Since Laura was one of
the older children in the Nursery School group, her parents wanted to
impress on her that she should try to help the younger children learn
right from wrong, so they said, "Well, Laura honey, how big is Kevin?"
Whereupon Laura held her two index fingers an inch or so apart and
said, "Oh, about this big."