Loan Jokes / Recent Jokes
a frog goes into a bank and and wants to get a loan the bank teller says,"whats your name?" "Kermit jagger" the frog says.
"like mick jagger? she says. yeah hes my dad. well what do you have to give us for security? i have this the frog says and pulls out a pink porceline pig the teller says hold on ill go check this with my boss, so she asks her
boss, whats this? he says well i think its a Knick Knack paddywack give a frog a loan his old mans a rolling stone.
AN assistant working with a foreign concern applied tor a loan to buy a scooter as he had to travel more than thirty kilometres per day and change three buses to reach office. Management took a sympathetic view and sanctioned the loan tor purchase of scooter on the condition that it the assistant failed to pay the monthly instalments to clear the loan, the scooter purchased would be impounded by the company.
The assistant then applied for a loan to build a house. The management again sanctioned the amount required with the condition that it he failed to pay back the amount in monthly instalments, his property would be impounded by the company.
Now that the assistant had a scooter and a newly constructed house, he felt he could take a wife and applied for another loan for marriage expenses. It was granted with similar condition that it he failed to pay monthly instalments, the goods acquired by the loan would be impounded by the company.
The assistant acquired a wife. more...
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller, whose name is Patricia Whack.
"Ms.Whack," he says, "I'd like to obtain a loan to buy a boat."
Patti furrows her brow and asks, "Well, how much do you want to barrow?"
"$30,000," the frog says.
The teller writes this down, then asks his name.
"My name is Kermit Jagger.I'm the son of Mick Jagger."
"Really?" she asks, eyebrow raised.
"Yes,"he says. Then he digs into his pants pocket and produces a tiny pink porcelain elephant."And I want to use this as collateral."
"Ummm, okay," Patti says, accepting the elephant."I'll have to ask the owner about this."
"That's fine," he says. "He'll vouch for me."
Patti walks into the bank owner's office and explains the situation."There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000 to buy a more...
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that the teller's name is Patricia Whack. So he says, "Ms. Whack, I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long vacation."
Patti looks at the frog in disbelief and asks how much he wants to borrow. The frog says $30,000. The teller asks his name and the frog says that his name is Kermit Jagger and that it's OK, he knows the bank manager.
Patti explains that $30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if he has anything he can use as collateral.
The frog says, "Sure. I have this." And he produces a tiny pink porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall. It's bright pink and perfectly formed.
Very confused, Patti explains that she'll have to consult with the manager; and disappears into a back office. She finds the manager and reports: "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who more...
A frog goes into a bank, and hops up on the desk of the loan officer. ''Hi,'' he croaks.''What's your name?''
The loan officer says, ''My name is John Paddywack. May I help you?''
''Yeah,'' says the frog. ''I'd like to borrow some money.''
The loan officer finds this a little odd, but gets out a form. ''Okay, what's your name?''
The frog replies, ''Kermit Jagger.''
''Really?'' says the loan officer. ''Any relation to Mick Jagger?''
''Yeah, he's my dad.''
''Hmmm,'' says the loan officer. ''Do you have any collateral?''
The frog hands over a pink ceramic elephant and asks, ''Will this do?''
The loan officer says, ''Um, I'm not sure. Let me go check with the bank manager.''
''Oh, tell him I said hi,'' adds the frog. ''He knows me.''
The loan officer goes back to the manager and says, ''Excuse me, sir, but there's a frog out there named Kermit Jagger who wants to borrow some money. All he has for collateral is this pink elephant thing; I'm not more...
A frog goes into the bank and asks the teller for a loan. The teller tells the frog to see Mr. Paddywack, the loan officer.
Mr. Paddywack looks at the frog and says, "What do you have for collateral?"
The frog pulls out of his pocket a solid silver elephant.
Mr. Paddywack looks at the elephant and says, "I don't know. I'm going to have to ask Mr. Larson, the bank manager to approve this."
He goes into Mr. Larson's office and comes back.
Two minutes later, Mr. Larson comes out with the elephant and says, "It's a knick-knack Paddywack, give the frog a loan!"