Lovemaking Jokes / Recent Jokes
A young, virile Italian man was relaxing at a bar, when he managed to attract the attention of a spectacular young blonde woman. Things progressed to the point where he invited her back to his apartment, and after some small talk, they made love.
A few moments later, he asked with a smile, "So... you finish?"
She paused for a moment, frowned, and replied, "No."
Somewhat surprised, he reached for her and the lovemaking resumed. This time, she thrashed around wildly, letting out frequent screams of passion. When the lovemaking ended, the young man smiled and again asked, "You finish?"
Once more she paused for a moment, smiled, and cuddling closer to him, said, "No."
Now stunned, but determined that she was not going to outlast him, he reached for her again. Using his last bit of strength, they climaxed simultaneously, screaming, bucking and clawing at the bedsheets.
Exhausted and gasping, the young man fell onto his back. more...
Q: My fiance still has feelings for his old girlfriends. I'm afraid he will not be faithful.
A: A man's capacity to love is boundless. It has been proven to increase with the number of sexual partners. Thus, by having a few other women, your partner is really increasing his love for you. Best thing to do is to buy him a nice, expensive present, cook him a nice meal and don't mention this aspect of his behavior.
Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys.
A: This is perfectly natural behavior - And it should be encouraged. The man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. Far from being pleasurable, a night out with the boys is a stressful affair, and to get back to you is a relief for your partner. Just look back at how emotional and happy the man is when he returns to his stable home. Best thing to do is to buy him a nice, expensive present, cook him a nice meal and don't mention this aspect of his behavior.
Q: My husband wants to more...
ARIES WOMEN: Wildly sensual, passionate and adventurous. You'll have sex anywhere, you know what you want - intense and frequent sex, you have a need for complete control, but you're also in love with love. As a mate, you are ardent, loyal, sentimental, and earthly. Biggest thrill - the tickle of a man's facial fuzz.
ARIES MEN: Sleeping with him is like playing croquet with live bombs - you never know what is going to happen! Never expect him to wait for you to be ready - he will rip your clothes off if he is ready to go. Don't tease him or you'd better be ready to deliver. Fond of slave master games and he likes it rough. Aries men are also explorers, so be ready to go where no woman has gone before. His favourite position: a woman on her knees leaning forward.
TAURUS WOMEN: You expect your man to be kind and patient and make love to you by the book. Like to be pleased by sex, but don't look for unusual approaches. But you are a demanding lover and leave your more...