Magnet Jokes

Magnet
Mr. Smythe had been giving his second-grade students a short lesson on science. He had explained about magnets and showed how they would pick up nails and other bits of iron. And now it was question time...
"Class," said he, "My name begins with the letter `M' and I pick up things.... What am I?"
A little boy on the front row said, "You're a mother!"

What did one magnet say to the other?
I find you very attractive.
What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?
Her New Jersey.
What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?
It's time to go to sweep.

How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? From a catalog. How you get down from an elephant? You don't, you get down from ducks. What city has the largest rodent population? Hamsterdam. What did God say when Joan of Arc showed up at the Pearly Gates? "Well done." What did one cloned sheep say to the other? "I am ewe." What did one magnet say to the other magnet? "I find you very attractive." What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved. What did one potato chip say to the other? Shall we go for a dip? What did the painter say to the wall? "One more crack and I'll plaster you!"What do cats like on a hot day? A mice cream cone. What do cats like on their hot dogs? Mouse-tard. What do cats like to eat for breakfast? Mice Krispies.

It's a simple feat to format and reuse AOL disks... but with a little imagination, a truly useful purpose can be found for those pesky white platters invading our mailboxes and magazines.
Mini cutting board (great for the office or the car, use metal door for knife).
Attach it to a ruler and presto! - you've got a fly swatter.
Construct a life size replica of Stonehenge.
At a restaurant, shove one under a wobbling table leg.
Money clip (use the metal door and discard the plastic case... the "rich nerd" look is IN this year).
Eye patch (for one-eyed software pirates).
Christmas ornaments (the more the merrier).
Give them to young children to use as building blocks.
Glue them to the bottom of the space shuttle and use them as re-entry burn tiles.
Dentures (melt & form them into new teeth for grandma).
Room dividers for hamsters.
Drink coasters.
Use multiple disks to create an ideal door stopper.
Ice scraper.
Bathroom more...

How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
From a catalog.
How you get down from an elephant?
You don't, you get down from ducks.
What city has the largest rodent population?
Hamsterdam.
What did God say when Joan of Arc showed up at the Pearly Gates?
"Well done."
What did one cloned sheep say to the other?
"I am ewe."
What did one magnet say to the other magnet?
"I find you very attractive."
What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
Nothing, they just waved.
What did one potato chip say to the other?
Shall we go for a dip?
What did the painter say to the wall?
"One more crack and I'll plaster you!"
What do cats like on a hot day?
A mice cream cone.
What do cats like on their hot dogs?
Mouse-tard.
What do cats like to eat for breakfast?
Mice Krispies.