"101 Uses For AOL Disks!" joke

It's a simple feat to format and reuse AOL disks... but with a little imagination, a truly useful purpose can be found for those pesky white platters invading our mailboxes and magazines.
Mini cutting board (great for the office or the car, use metal door for knife).
Attach it to a ruler and presto! - you've got a fly swatter.
Construct a life size replica of Stonehenge.
At a restaurant, shove one under a wobbling table leg.
Money clip (use the metal door and discard the plastic case... the "rich nerd" look is IN this year).
Eye patch (for one-eyed software pirates).
Christmas ornaments (the more the merrier).
Give them to young children to use as building blocks.
Glue them to the bottom of the space shuttle and use them as re-entry burn tiles.
Dentures (melt & form them into new teeth for grandma).
Room dividers for hamsters.
Drink coasters.
Use multiple disks to create an ideal door stopper.
Ice scraper.
Bathroom tile.
Bookmark.
Mini frisbee.
Air hockey puck.
Dog chew toy.
Dart board.
Pooper scooper.
Grill scraper.
Use them for karate board-breaking demonstrations (save a tree).
Wrist slicer - after receiving first AOL bill (use metal door).
Conversation piece for coffee table.
Destroy them - smash, burn, or run over to relieve stress.
Light switch cover.
Chinese throwing stars (tape 2 together).
Clay pigeons for target practice.
Greeting card (bind two together at one end).
Halloween treat (give them away all night long).
Bullet proof vest (arrange together in triple thickness).
Firewood.
Bird house.
Paper weights.
Pen holders (make a box without a top).
Post-it notes holder.
Refrigerator magnet (glue a magnet to the back).
A very sturdy base for putting the motorcycle sidestand on when parking on soft surfaces.
Keep 'em in the trunk for extra traction in the snow.
Solar Eclipse Glasses (open door and look through disk at the sun/moon - actually works).
Placing one in each back pocket helps children who get paddled by the coach. This spreads the force to a wider area.
Make an AOL disk & pasta casserole.
Incense burners (put stick in hole of disk hub and light the incense).
Bug Shield (glue a bunch to the front of your car's hood).
Put them on car windshields at the mall (along with this list).
Melt the plastic of the disks into a giant sculpture.
Hand them out as party favors.
Hidden/spare key holder (crack open one side, insert key and then place near door. Completely safe... who would want an AOL disk?).
Vertical blinds.
Be an AOL diskette surgeon and disect a diskette.
Bench press weights (I can press 120).
Grind 'em up and refertilize the front lawn.
The new "Domino's stuffed-crust pizza" filling.
Tell the kids to leave warm milk & AOL disks for Santa.
Brake shoes.
House insulation.
Recycle them for the scrap metal.
Kitchen tile for Bill Gates' new mansion in Seattle (walk all over the competition).
Hockey Puck.
Add water and special plant life to make a Chia-Disk.
Noise maker for your bike spokes (why damage your valuable baseball cards).
Put one on a leash and drag it along as you walk... makes the perfect pet.
Poker chips.
Baseball practice (throw them up in the air and hit them with the bat).
Keychain (Put a key ring through one of the write-protect holes and you've got a snappy executive bathroom keychain for the office).
Mail to 10 friends - start an AOL chain-letter (add a disk with each link).
Earmuffs (glue some fur on one side, then attach a U-shaped piece of bent coathanger to both disks).
Grind them up to make fake snow.
Earrings (put loop into write-protect hole).
Dental floss (use actual disk).
Use them for zipper pulls (instead of ski lift tickets).
When your collection of disks reaches 52, use them for a deck of cards.
Use them to fill potholes.
Hood ornament.
Snow blower replacement blades.
Put them in your shirt pocket to make you look smart.
Make two stacks of 10 and use them as heels for platform shoes.
Rubik's cube case