Marion Jokes / Recent Jokes
On December 16th, former Washington D.C. mayor Marion Barry was stopped by Park Police and arrested for driving with a suspended license.
Police also charged Barry with wearing white after Labor Day.
Barry is considering suing the government saying he was humiliated and severely inconvenienced.
After a brief look at the kind of year Barry's had..
November 14, 2006: Barry Pleads Not Guilty To DUISeptember 11, 2006: Marion Barry Detained By PoliceAugust 7, 2006: Barry Facing More Legal WoesMay 12, 2006: Police: Former Mayor Fails Field Sobriety TestMarch 9, 2006: Marion Barry Sentenced On Tax ChargesFebruary 27, 2006: Barry Shows Off Gasifier MachineFebruary 8, 2006: Federal Judge Postpones Barry SentencingFebruary 7, 2006: Marion Barry Heads Back To CourtJanuary 11, 2006: Marion Barry Fails Drug TestPark Police said they would counter-sue saying it was really inconvenient to have to lock this knucklehead up every other month.
All the merry men and Maid Marion, gathered around Robin Hood's deathbed, waiting for the inevitable end. Manfully, heroically, Robin struggled up and said "Friar Tuck, bring me my long bow. I will fire an arrow out the window and wherever it lands, that is where you will bury me." Deeply moved, they placed a long bow in his trembling fingers, propped him up and faced him towards Sherwood Forest. And with an immense effort, Robin aimed and fired. And so it came to pass that they buried him on top of the wardrobe.
** All of the following quotes have been attributed to Marion Barry, Mayor of Washington, D.C.. . **
'The contagious people of Washington have stood firm against diversity during this long period of increment weather.'
'I promise you a police car on every sidewalk.'
'If you take out the killings, Washington actually has a very, very low crime rate.'
'First, it was not a strip bar, it was an erotic club. And second, what can I say? I'm a night owl.'
'I am clearly more popular than Reagan. I am in my third term. Where's Reagan? Gone after two! Defeated by George Bush and Michael Dukakis no less.'
'The laws in this city are clearly racist. All laws are racist. The law of gravity is racist.'
'I am making this trip to Africa because Washington is an international city, just like Tokyo, Nigeria or Israel. As mayor, I am an international symbol. Can you deny that to Africa?'
'People have criticized me more...
Marion Jones has asked a judge not to give her jail time, saying her disgrace was punishment enough. Which will set up a very convincing insanity plea. Yes, humiliation is a true substitute for jail time. Luckily for Jones, this is the same judge that ordered an armed robber to be publicly nooggied. In fairness, Jones was stripped of all of her medals. And there's no replacing those – except with the millions of dollars she got to keep.