Matrimonial Jokes

There was a time when I used to carefully scan matrimonial advertisements, not to look for a wife but just to find out what others were looking for in their life-partners. I gave up wasting my time on them many years ago. When I casually glance at them I am surprised to find they are dividing the categories by caste, profession and nationality. The latest categorisation has been brought to my attention by T. R. Rishi; apparently living in South Delhi has acquired status of acceptability. Three ads from The Hindustan Times state clearly "residing in South Delhi. Preference for South Delhiites." One adds a clarification "affluent South Delhi family".

Today's local newspapers had a humour page with following matrimonial published in it.
DOCTOR = Recently a love-bug injected in me a strange bacteria, making me desirous of marriage. I'm looking for a girl who is patient and has knowledge of all ills and pills, is religious minded and keeps away from all sins be it anasin, metasin or crosin. I promise to be a good doctor with no side effects. Apply or reply.
LAWYER = I hereby beg to solicit myself as an eligible candidate for the post of husband after marriage. The person whom I'm looking for should be strictly a girl. The girl should be strictly a girl. The girl should be willing to surrender to the service and jurisdiction of My Lord i. e. Myself. Any objection would be overruled and will not be sustained. Apply in confidence and if you have the confidence.
BOATMAN = Must be able to dig, clean, cook worms and clean fish. Must have own boat with motor. Please send the photograph of
motorboat.
BANKER = Wanted more...