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A Bible study group was discussing the unforeseen possibility of sudden death. "We will all die some day," the leader of the
discussion said, "and none of us really knows when, but if we did we would all do a better job of preparing ourselves for that inevitable event." Everybody nodded their heads in agreement with this comment."What would you do if you knew you only had 4 weeks of life remaining before your death, before your Great Judgment Day?" the leader asked the group."For those 4 weeks, I would go out into my community and minister the Gospel to those that have not yet accepted Jesus into their lives," one gentleman said."A very admirable thing to do," said the group leader. And all the group members agreed that would be a very good thing to do."For those 4 weeks, I would dedicate all of my remaining time to serving my family, my church, and my fellow man with a greater
conviction," one lady said, more...

By Andrew Marlatt
Sunday, February 10, 2002; Page B05
Bitter after being snubbed for membership in the "Axis of Evil," Libya, China and Syria today announced they had formed the Axis of Just as Evil, which they said would be "way eviler" than the Iran-Iraq-North Korea axis President Bush warned of in his State of the Union address.
Axis of Evil members immediately dismissed the new axis as having, for starters, a really dumb name.
"Right. They are Just as Evil... in their dreams!" declared North Korean President Kim Jong Il. "Everybody knows we're the best evils....I mean the best at being evil....We're the best."
Diplomats from Syria denied they were jealous over being excluded, although they conceded they did ask if they could join the Axis of Evil. "They told us it was full," said Syrian President Bashar Assad.
"An Axis can't have more than three countries," explained Iraqi President Saddam Hussein. more...

After a long career in teaching, you have finally reached that magical year when you are about to retire. As the year flies along, you begin to notice changes in and around you that signal to everyone that you must be a retiree-to-be and retirement weeks away!
You know you’re a retiree-to-be when…
Fellow staff members greet you in the hall with, “Oh! Stop smiling! ”
You get up to the checkout counter at Borders, and you realize you’re buying books you won’t need next year.
Your file cabinets are getting lighter, and your circular file is getting heavier.
You find yourself saying, “Yes! ” whenever an administrator or union officer asks you to be on a committee next year.
The custodian has complained to the principal that the trash he removes daily from your room is 10 to 20 times greater than any other room in the building- including the cafeteria.
You get in line at the copy machine, and realize you don’t have anything to more...

How many members of the Bush Administration are needed to replace a lightbulb?
The Answer is SEVEN:
(1) One to deny that a lightbulb needs to be replaced,
(2) one to attack and question the patriotism of anyone who has questions about the lightbulb,
(3) one to blame the previous administration for the need of a new lightbulb,
(4) one to arrange the invasion of a country rumored to have a secret stockpile of lightbulbs,
(5) one to get together with Vice President Cheney and figure out how to pay Halliburton Industries one million dollars for a lightbulb,
(6) one to arrange a photo-op session showing Bush changing the lightbulb while dressed in a flight suit and wrapped in an American flag,
(7) and finally one to explain to Bush the difference between screwing a lightbulb and screwing the country.

Many people died and first they went to heaven and god sent them to hell
The god of Hell gave each of them a BOON there were fifty members
GOD;Now you can ask your boon one by one
No1; God i wnt to go back to life in world
AND all the next forty eight members asked the same The last man came and asked
No50;god kindly cancel all the boons offred to the fuirst forty nine members which is a good thing will send me alive to the world.

Q: "How many members of the coalition does it take to screw in a light bulb?" A: "We are not prepared to comment on specific numbers at this time."

A Bible study group was discussing the unforeseen possibility of their sudden death. The leader of the discussion said, " We will all die some day, and none of us really know when, but if we did we would all do a better job of preparing ourselves for that inevitable event."Everybody shook their heads in agreement with this comment. Then the leader said to the group, "What would you do if you knew you only had 4 weeks of life remaining before your death, and then the Great Judgment Day?"A gentleman said, " I would go out into my community and minister the Gospel to those that have not yet accepted the Lord into their lives.""Very good!", said the group leader, and all the group members agreed, that would be a very good thing to do.One lady spoke up and said enthusiastically, "I would dedicate all of my remaining time to serving God, my family, my church, and my fellow man with a greater conviction.""That's wonderful!" the more...