Mexico Jokes / Recent Jokes

Cracking an international market is a goal of most growing corporations. It shouldn't be that hard, yet even the big multi-nationals run into trouble because of language and cultural differences. For example...The name Coca-Cola in China was first rendered as Ke-kou-ke-la. Unfortunately, the Coke company did not discover until after thousands of signs had been printed that the phrase means "bite the wax tadpole" or "female horse stuffed with wax" depending on the dialect. Coke then researched 40,000 Chinese characters and found a close phonetic equivalent, "ko-kou-ko-le," which can be loosely translated as "happiness in the mouth."In Taiwan, the translation of the Pepsi slogan "Come alive with the Pepsi Generation" came out as "Pepsi will bring your ancestors back from the dead."Also in Chinese, the Kentucky Fried Chicken slogan "finger-lickin' good" came out as "eat your fingers off."The American slogan more...

Two guys are bungee-jumping one day. The first guy says to the second. "You know, we could make a lot of money running our own bungee-jumping service in Mexico."
The second guy thinks this is a great idea, so the two pool their money and buy everything they'll need - a tower, an elastic cord, insurance, etc.
They travel to Mexico and begin to set up on the square. As they are constructing the tower, a crowd begins to assemble. Slowly, more and more people gather to watch them at work.
The first guy jumps. He bounces at the end of the cord, but when he comes back up, the second guy notices that he has a few cuts and scratches. Unfortunately, the second guy isn't able catch him, he falls again, bounces and comes back up again.
This time, he is bruised and bleeding. Again, the second guy misses him. The first guy falls again and bounces back up. This time, he comes back pretty messed up - he's got a couple of broken bones and is almost unconscious.
Luckily, more...

Two guys are bungee-jumping one day. The first guy says to the second. "You know, we could make a lot of money running our own bungee-jumping service in Mexico."The second guy thinks this is a great idea, so the two pool their money and buy everything they'll need - a tower, an elastic cord, insurance, etc.They travel to Mexico and begin to set up on the square. As they are constructing the tower, a crowd begins to assemble. Slowly, more and more people gather to watch them at work.The first guy jumps. He bounces at the end of the cord, but when he comes back up, the second guy notices that he has a few cuts and scratches. Unfortunately, the second guy isn't able catch him, he falls again, bounces and comes back up again.This time, he is bruised and bleeding. Again, the second guy misses him. The first guy falls again and bounces back up. This time, he comes back pretty messed up - he's got a couple of broken bones and is almost unconscious.Luckily, the second guy finally more...

Two guys are bungee-jumping one day.
The first guy says to the second. "You know, we could make a lot of money running our own bungee-jumping service in Mexico."
The second guy thinks this is a great idea, so the two pool their money and buy everything they'll need - a tower, an elastic cord, insurance, etc.
They travel to Mexico and begin to set up on the square. As they are constructing the tower, a crowd begins to assemble. Slowly, more and more people gather to watch them at work.
The first guy jumps. He bounces at the end of the cord, but when he comes back up, the second guy notices that he has a few cuts and scratches. Unfortunately, the second guy isn't able catch him, he falls again, bounces and comes back up again. This time, he is bruised and bleeding. Again, the second guy misses him.
The first guy falls again and bounces back up. This time, he comes back pretty messed up - he's got a couple of broken bones and is almost more...

There's a lot of things I wonder about in life. Such as, who does the Mexican Embassy hire to mow their lawns?

What do they call Santa's helpers?
Subordinate Clauses

What do you call Santa Clause after he's fallen into a fireplace?
Krisp Kringle

Which of Santa's reindeers needs to mind his manners the most?
"Rude'olph

Where do Santa's reindeers like to stop for lunch?
Deery Queen

What do you call the fear of getting stuck while sliding down a
chimney?
Santa Claus-trophbia

What nationality is Santa Claus?
North Polish

What do you call a bunch of grandmasters of chess bragging about
their games in a hotel lobby?
Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.

How do sheep in Mexico say Merry Christmas?
Fleece Navidad

What do you get when you cross an archer with a gift-wrapper?
Ribbonhood

Why was Santa's little helper depressed?
Because he had low elf esteem.

How do canines in Mexico say Merry Christmas?
Fleas Navidog.

I called my mom yesterday and told her I ate a burrito from a new mexican place that was kinda nasty.

She said "you call me before you put anything new in your mouth."

I called her back 1/2 an hour later and said "Mom...black cock...yes or no?"