Mitchell Jokes

To all those Freshman note takers out there....here's an example of good
note taking :-)...
How to Take Notes
WHEN PROFESSOR MITCHELL SAYS:
"Probably the greatest quality
of the poetry of John Milton, who
was born in 1608, is the combination
of beauty and power. Few have
excelled him in the use of the
English language, or for that
matter, in lucidity of verse form,
'Paradise Lost' being said to be
the greatest single poem ever
written."
YOU WRITE:
John Milton-born 1608
WHEN PROFESSOR MITCHELL SAYS:
"When Lafayette first came to
this country, he discovered
America. The Americans needed his
help if their cause was to survive,
and this he promptly supplied them."
YOU WRITE:
Lafayette discovered America
WHEN PROFESSOR MITCHELL SAYS:
"Current historians have come to
doubt the complete advantageousness
of some of Roosevelt's policies"
YOU more...

My son, Mitchell, a kindergartener, practices spelling with magnetic letters on the refrigerator: "cat," "dog," "dad," and "mom" have been proudly displayed for all to see.One morning while getting ready for the day, Mitchell bounded into the room with his arms outstretched. In his hands were three magnetic letters: G-O-D. "Look what I spelled, Mom!" Mitch exclaimed, a proud smile on his face."That's wonderful!" I said. "Now go put them on the fridge so Dad can see when he gets home tonight." That Christian education is certainly having an impact, I thought, happily.Just then, a little voice called from the kitchen."Mom? How do you spell' zilla?'"

WHEN PROFESSOR MITCHELL SAYS:
YOU WRITE:
"Probably the greatest quality of the
poetry of John Milton, who was born in
1608, is the combination of beauty and
power. Few have excelled him in the use
of the English language, or for that
matter, in lucidity of verse form,
' Paradise Lost' being said to be the
greatest single poem ever written."
John Milton--born 1608
"When Lafayette first came to this
country, he discovered America. The
Americans needed his help if their
cause was to survive, and this he
promptly supplied them."
Lafayette discovered America
"Current historians have come to doubt
the complete advantageousness of some
of Roosevelt's policies"
Most of the problems that now face
the United States are directly
traceable to the bungling and greed
of President Roosevelt.
"... it is possible that we do not
understand the more...

Little Mitchell hurt his finger and ran crying to his mother. She kissed it and said, "There, that will make it feel better."
A few minutes later, Mitchell scratched his forehead. His mother took care of the wound, then once more kissed the spot and sent her little man out to play.
In half an hour Mitchell was back again. This time one of his friends had kicked him in a more intimate region; he came in screaming wildly and pointing to the spot.
"Damn it," said his mother, "you're getting more like your father every day."

During an award ceremony the wife of Spain's ambassador to Washington asked former Sen. George Mitchell if he could make his speech a bit longer, since the ambassador had still not arrived from the airport. Mitchell replied: "I spent years in the U.S. Senate, Madam. I can speak on any subject for any length of time -- usually on a subject about which I have no particular knowledge."