Moron Jokes / Recent Jokes

What's the difference between boogers and broccoli? Kids won't eat broccoli.
What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? I don't know and I don't care.
What's the difference between the capital of Russia and a calf's mother? One is Moscow, the other is cow's ma.
Where did the vegetables go to get drunk? The Salad Bar.
Where do you get virgin wool from? Ugly sheep.
Where does a one-armed man shop? At a second hand store.
Where does the Lone Ranger take his garbage? Ta da dump, ta da dump, ta da dump Dump DUMP!!!
Which of these things don't belong: A tuna, a lobster, or a Chinese guy run over by a truck? The tuna. The other two are crustaceans.
Who delivers puppies when the Vet isn't available? The mid woof.
Why can't a woman ask her brother for help? Because he can't be a brother and assist her too.
Why did the big moron fall off the roof and the little moron didn't? Because he was a little more on.
Why did the chicken cross the road? more...

What's the difference between boogers and broccoli? Kids won't eat broccoli.What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? I don't know and I don't care.What's the difference between the capital of Russia and a calf's mother? One is Moscow, the other is cow's ma.Where did the vegetables go to get drunk? The Salad Bar.Where do you get virgin wool from? Ugly sheep.Where does a one-armed man shop? At a second hand store.Where does the Lone Ranger take his garbage? Ta da dump, ta da dump, ta da dump Dump DUMP!!! Which of these things don't belong: A tuna, a lobster, or a Chinese guy run over by a truck? The tuna. The other two are crustaceans.Who delivers puppies when the Vet isn't available? The mid woof.Why can't a woman ask her brother for help? Because he can't be a brother and assist her too.Why did the big moron fall off the roof and the little moron didn't? Because he was a little more on.Why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the opossum it could be done.

A: Why did the chewing-gum cross the road?
B: Because it was stuck to the chickens foot.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To show the possum it could be done.

Q: Why do people call their own language their mother tongue?
A: Because their fathers seldom get a chance to use it.

NOTE: For this to be funny, students need to understand that in many cultures women have the image of speaking so much that their husbands seldom have a chance to say anything.

Q: A big moron and a little moron are walking across a bridge when the big moron falls off. Why didn't the little moron fall off?
A: He was a little more on.

Q: Name one eight letter word that has kst in the middle, in the beginning, and at the end.
A: "Inkstand", "in" is at the beginning, "kst" is in the middle, and "and" is at the end.

Q: When does a dialect become a language?
A: When its more...

there were 3 guys that went sky diving. one dropped a pebbleand jumped.the second dropped a rock. and the third dropped a grenade. when the first guy landed he was a little kid crying so he asked "hey kid why are you crying" and the kid replied "I just got nailed by some moron that threw a pebble at me." when the second guy landed he saw a man with a big bump on his head so he asked "how did you get that big bump on your head?" and the man replied "some moron threw a rock at me." when the third guy landed he saw this little kid laughing so hard his face turned red. so he aske "hey kid whats so funny?" and the little kid replies"my daddy farted and the house blew up."

After completing his run through the park, Wallace threw himself on the grass and did some pushups. Just then a moron happened by.
"I hate to say it," the moron offered, "But I think she slipped away,"

Spokesman Shows Footage of President Tumbling from Bike

In what some political insiders were calling an attempt to lower expectations in the days leading up to the first presidential debate, the White House today announced that President Bush has an I.Q. of 67.

"The president is far, far less intelligent than is commonly thought," White House spokesman Scott McClellan told reporters. "Even the simplest tasks remain well beyond his reach."

Reinforcing the impression that the president will be overmatched in Thursday's debate with Sen. John Kerry, Mr. McClellan showed reporters never-before-seen footage of Mr. Bush oafishly tumbling from his mountain bike.

"What a moron," Mr. McClellan said.

The White House spokesman said that Mr. Bush cannot possibly be expected to do well in a debate with Sen. Kerry, who Mr. McClellan said "has an I.Q. of 193" and "is widely considered the best debater more...

Aaron Thetires (Air in the Tires)
Abe Rudder (Hey Brother)
Abbie Birthday (Happy Birthday)
Abel N. Willan (Able and Willing)
Achilles Punks (I'll Kill These Punks)
Adam Bomb (Atom Bomb)
Adam Meway (Out of My Way)
Adam Sapple (Adam's Apple)
Adolf Oliver Nippils (Ate Off All Of Her Nipples)
Al B. Zienya (I'll Be Seeing You)
Al DePantzeu (I'll De-Pants You)
Al Gore-Rythim (Algorithym)
Al Kaholic (Alcoholic)
Al Kaseltzer (Alkaseltzer)
Al Kickurass (I'll Kick Your Ass)
Al Killeu (I'll Kill You)
Al Luminum (Aluminum)
Al Nino (El Nino)
Al O'Moaney (Alimony)
Alpha Kenny Wun (I'll Fuck Anyone)
Alec Tricity (Electricity)
Alex Blaine Layder (I'll Explain Later)
Alf Abet (Alphabet)
Ali Gator (Ali Gator)
Allota Fagina (A lot of vagina)
Amanda B. Recandwithe (A Man to Be Reckoned With)
Amanda Lay (A Man To Lay)
Amanda Hugnkiss (A Man to Hug and Kiss)
Andy more...