Mother-in-law Jokes / Recent Jokes

A big-game hunter went on safari with his wife and mother-in-law. One evening, while still deep in the jungle, the wife awoke to find her mother gone. Rushing to her husband, she insisted on them both trying to find her mother.

The hunter picked up his rifle, took a swig of whiskey, and started to look for her. In a clearing not far from the camp, they came upon a chilling sight: the mother-in-law was backed up against a thick, impenetrable bush, and a large male lion stood facing her.

The wife cried, "What are we going to do?"

"Nothing," said the husband.
"The lion got himself into this mess. Let him get himself out of it!"

It's for my mother-in-law," explained the mourner at the funeral procession. Tightening the leash, he gestured down at the dog and said, "My Doberman here killed her." "Gee...That's terrible," commiserated the spectator. "But... Hmmmm... Is there anyway you might lend me your dog for a day or so?" The bereaved son-in-law pointed his thumb over his shoulder and answered, "Get in line."

A man, his wife, and his mother-in-law went on vacation to the Holy Land. While they were there, the mother-in-law passed away.
The undertaker told them, "You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here in the Holy Land for $150.00."
The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home.
The undertaker asked, "Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your mother-in-law home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and spend only $150.00?"
The man replied, "A man died here 2000 years ago, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can't take that chance."

A big game hunter went on safari with his wife and mother-in-law. One evening, while still deep in the jungle, the wife awoke to find her mother gone. Rushing to her husband, she insisted on them both trying to find her mother. The hunter picked up his rifle, took a swig of whiskey, and started to look for her.

In a clearing not far from the camp, they came upon a chilling sight. His mother-in-law was backed up against a thick, impenetrable bush, and a large male lion stood facing her.

The wife said, "What are we going to do?"

"Nothing," said the hunter, "The lion got himself into this mess, let him get himself out of it."

Two cannibals were sitting down eating lunch.
One says to the other, "You know, I just can't stand my mother-in-law."
The other one replies, "Forget about her! Just put her to the side and eat the mashed potatoes."

The new bahu demurely told her mother-inJaw, "Ma! I want to know about the customs here." The mother-in-law, pleased, said, "Yes. Yes. Go ahead!" "How many months after marriage are babies delivered here?" the bahu enquired. "Why, after nine months," told the mother-in-law, struck by her bahu's innocence. "But", declared the bahu, "in my father's place, they do it after six months, and for the first time I shall follow their custom."

The hit-and-run victim was just getting to his feet when apoliceman ran up to help. "My mother-in-law just tried to runme over!" the shaken man told the cop." The car hit you from behind," the officer said. "How couldyou tell it was your mother-in-law?" "I recognized the laugh!" he replied.