Music Jokes / Recent Jokes

Q: How can you tell the difference between all the banjo songs?
A: By their names.

Q. How is playing a bagpipe like throwing a javelin blindfolded? A. You dont have to be very good to get peoples attention.

A guy climbs on to a bus, he is carrying a Double Bass, The bus driver says, ...." I dont know where your going with that thing, but when you get there, I hope they ask you to play......................."

A wedding occurred just outside Cavan in Ireland.To keep tradition going, everyone gets extremely drunk and the bride's and groom's families have a storming row and begin wrecking the reception room and generally kicking the shit out of each other. The police get called in to break up the fight.The following week, all members of both families appear in court. The fight continues in the courtroom until the judge finally brings calm with the use of his gavel, shouting, 'Silence in court!'The courtroom goes silent and Paddy, the best man, stands up and says,'Judge, I was the best man at the wedding and I think I should explain what happened.'The judge agrees and asks Paddy to take the stand. Paddy begins his explanation by telling the court that it is traditional in a Cavan wedding that the best man gets the first dance with the bride.The judge says, 'OK.''Well,' said Paddy, 'after I had finished the first dance, the music kept going, so I continued dancing to the second song, and after more...

Q: What is the difference between a violin and a viola?
A: A viola burns longer.

Yesterday,
All those backups seemed a waste of pay.
Now my database has gone away.
Oh I believe in yesterday.
Suddenly,
There's not half the files there used to be,
And there's a milestone hanging over me
The system crashed so suddenly.
I pushed something wrong
What it was I could not say.
Now all my data's gone
And I long for yesterday-ay-ay-ay.
Yesterday,
The need for back-ups seemed so far away.
I knew my data was all here to stay,
Now I believe in yesterday.

A violist and a cellist were standing on a sinking ship together."Help!" cried the cellist, "I cant swim!""Dont worry," said the violist, "just fake it."