Musicians Jokes

Q: How many bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Two. One to screw it in, and one to complain that its electrified.

How do musicians do it...
Altos are sandwiched between sopranos and tenors.
Altos have body.
Bach did it with the organ.
Band members do it all night.
Band members do it in a parade.
Band members do it in front of 100,000 people.
Band members do it in public.
Band members do it in sectionals.
Band members do it on the football field.
Baritones do it deeper.
Bass clarinetists put it between their legs and blow.
Basses and altos do it lower.
Basses have rhythm.
Beethoven did it apassionately.
Beethoven was the first to do it with a full orchestra.
Choir boys do it unaccompanied.
Clarinetists do it with alternate fingerings.
Contrabass clarinetists do it deeper with a lot of tongue and steady rhythm.
Cymbal players do it with a crash.
DJs do it on request.
DJs do it on the air.
Drummers beat it.
Drummers do it in 4/4 time.
Drummers do it longer.
Drummers do it with both hands and more...

Q: How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb? A: Twenty. 1 to do it and the other 19 to stand around and say, "I can do that!"Q: What do you get if Bach falls off a horse, but has the courage to get on again and continue riding? A: Bach in the saddle again.Q: How many bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Two. One to screw it in, and one to complain that it's electrified.Q: How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb? A: Twenty. 1 to hold the bulb, 2 to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.Q: How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb? A: Seven; one to change and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.Q: Why don't they know where Mozart is buried? A: Because he's Haydn! Q: What's musical and handy in a supermarket? A: A Chopin Liszt.Q: What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins? A: A pair of Re-bachs.Q: What do you call a male quartet? A: Three men and a tenor.

How many jazz musicians does it take to change a lightbulb?
Don't worry about the changes, we'll fake it!
Note: In jazz, the chord changes are what dictates the improvisation of the music.

What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?
A drummer.