Naming Jokes

Sudan has found the British teacher who allowed students to name a teddy bear'Muhammad' guilty of insulting religion and inciting hatred against Islam, and has sentenced her to 15 days in jail and to deportation.

Upon hearing this news, people all over Sudan began naming teddy bears Muhammad.



While jurists in the free world mostly agreed with the Sudan verdict, they disagreed with the charges, saying that the teacher instead should have been convicted for insulting a teddy bear.

They argued that naming a bed of nails or a guillotine'Muhammad' is one thing, but warm and fuzzy objects such as teddy bears truly run contrary to Islam.

Since history began, the Chinese always believed in the significance of one's name. They have developed a very comprehensive system of naming one's children as it is believed that the name of a person strongly influences one's destiny and fate.
Astrologers, fortune tellers, academics and monks are consulted when choosing a name for the new born. The other cultures, however do not really believe in it and tend to brush it off as superstition. Whether you believe it or not, however, the other cultures are not spared of this correlation.
For example, the Chinese surname LEE (Li) is associated with power and success such as Lee Kuan Yew, Lee Teng Hui (Taiwanese President), Li Peng (China's ex PM), Li Ka Shing (HK tycoon) and LEE Iacocca - once Chrysler's chief, Lee Van Cliff, the actor.
One very good example is Lee Iacocca, whose first name IACOCCA stands more...

The Naming of JesusA group of biblical scholars were involved in a heated discussion about how Jesus of Nazareth was named. How did he become known as the Messiah, or Christ. One of the scholars argued that the name was a Greek corruption of Aramaic, and purists and fundamentalists ought to use the name Joshua. Another argued that Joshua was Hebrew, not Aramaic, to which a third argued that Hebrew should be used because Jesus was said to be the King of the Jews. The debate went on and on and became more and more sophisticated and obtuse. Finally, an old man known for his wisdom intervened. He informed the group that he knew how Jesus was named. When Jesus was born, a star shown in the sky, and three wise men from the East travelled to Bethlehem. They had travelled for days, suffered great deprivation, and when they finally got to Bethlehem got lost trying to find the manger. Finally, after much ado, and in rather foul moods, they reached the manger and entered the stall. As one of more...

On the third day I was dust, ordinary common dust like you see on a country road in a dry spell, nothing expected of me, me expecting nothing neither.
On the sixth day he comes along and blows. "In my own image too", he says, like he was doing me a favor.
Sometimes I think if he'd waited a million years by then I'd been tired maybe being dust but after only two, three days, what can you expect? I wasn't used to being dust and he goes and makes me into Man.
He could see right away from the expression on my face I didn't like it so he's going to butter me up. He puts me in this garden only I don't butter.
He brings me all the animals I should give them names What do I know of names? "Call it something," he says, "anything you want," so I make names up lion, tiger, elephant, giraffe - crazy but that's what he wants.
I'm naming animals since 5 AM, in the evening I'm tired I go to bed early, in the morning I wake up, there she is sitting by more...

The University of Phoenix bought the naming rights to the Arizona Cardinals' new stadium. The move will honor the Cardinals’ long tradition of mediocrity. The stadium is just like a degree from the University of Phoenix - shiny on the outside, empty on the inside.