Natural Jokes / Recent Jokes

It was graduation day and Mom was trying to take a picture of their son in a cap and gown, posed with his father. "I want a good picture, so try to make this look natural," she said. "Junior, put your arm around your dad's shoulder." The father answered, "If you want it to look natural, why not have him put his hand in my pocket?"

Children are natural mimics, who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.

Children are natural mimics. They act like their parents in spite of
every attempt to teach them good manners.

There are three ladies. Each walk into a salon at different times. A barber looks up as a
brown haired girl walks in. "
Wow. You have such
beautiful brown hair."
and the girl says, "
Thanks, it's natural."
she runs her hand through her hair. Then the blonde walks in. "
You have shiney blonde hair."
and the blonde does the same. "
Oh. Thanks. It's natural."
she ran her hand through her hair. Then an unusual green haired lady walks in. "
Your hair sure is different."
the barber says. "
Oh. Wow. It's natural."
she runs her hand up her nostrils, and to her hair!

The accountant was visiting the Museum of Natural History and said to the person standing next to him, "That dinosaur is two billion years and ten months old."
"How did you get such exact information?"
"I was here ten months ago and the guide said the dinosaur was two billion years old."

There was an old married couple that had happily lived together for nearly forty years. The only friction in their marriage was caused by the husband's habit of breaking wind nearly every morning as he awoke. The noise would always wake up his wife and the smells would cause her eyes to water as she would choke and gasp for air.

Nearly every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping one in the morning. He told her that he couldn't help it. She begged him to see a doctor to see if anything could be done but the husband wouldn't hear of it. He told her that it was just a natural function and then would laugh in her face as she tried to wave the fumes away with her hands. She told him that there was nothing natural about it and if he didn't stop, he was one day going to "fart his guts out."

The years went by and the wife continued to suffer and the husband continued to ignore her warnings about "farting his guts out." That is until one more...

The following information was gained through much arduous research
involving men and women from all backgrounds and walks of life. It
consists of the most often asked questions of women (i. e..
relationships, sex and life in general). All women who read this are
encouraged to use the wisdom contained therein to change their
behavior in accordance with the truths established below.
Q: How do I know if I'm ready for sex?
A: Ask your boyfriend. He'll know when the time is right. When it
comes to love and sex, men are much more responsible, since they're
not emotionally confused as women. It's a proven fact.
Q: Should I have sex on the first date?
A: YES. Before if possible.
Q: What exactly happens during the act of sex?
A: Again, this is entirely up to the man. The important thing to
remember is that you must do whatever he tells you without question.
Sometimes, however, he may ask you to do certain things that more...