Necessarily Jokes / Recent Jokes

Once upon a time, there was a non-conforming sparrow who decided not to fly south for the winter.However, soon the weather turned so cold that he reluctantly started to fly south. In a short time, ice began to form on his wings and he fell to earth in a barnyard, almost frozen.A cow passed by and crapped on the little sparrow. The sparrow thought it was the end. But, the manure warmed him and defrosted his wings. Warm and happy, able to breathe, he started to sing. Just then a large cat came by and, hearing the chirping, investigated the sounds.The cat cleared away the manure, found the chirping bird and promptly ate him.The moral of the story:1. Everyone who craps on you is not necessarily your enemy.2. Everyone who gets you out of the crap is not necessarily your friend.3. And, if you're warm and happy in a pile of crap, keep your mouth shut.

A not necessarily well-prepared student sat in his life science classroom, staring at a question on the final exam paper. The question directed: "Give four advantages of breast milk."
What to write? He sighed, and began to scribble whatever came into his head, hoping for the best:
1. No need to boil.
2. Never goes sour.
3. Available whenever necessary.
So far so good - maybe. But the exam demanded a fourth answer. Again, what to write? Once more, he sighed. He frowned. He scowled, then sighed again. Suddenly, he brightened. He grabbed his pen, and triumphantly, he scribbled his definitive answer:
4. Available in attractive containers of varying sizes.
He received an A.

Anything created must necessarily be inferior to the essence of the creator. - Claude Shouse

There was once a non-conforming sparrow who decided to not fly south for the winter. However, the weather soon turned so cold that he changed his mind and reluctantly decided to fly south after all.
In a short time, ice began to form on his wings and he fell to Earth, landing in a barnyard, nearly frozen solid. A cow passed where he had fallen and crapped on the little sparrow. The little sparrow thought it was the end, but the manure warmed him and defrosted his wings.
Warm, happy, and able to breathe, the little sparrow began to sing.
Just then, a large cat came by, heard the chirping and investigated the sound. Clearing away the manure, the cat found the little chirping sparrow and promptly ate him!
The moral of the story...
Everyone who craps on you is not necessarily your enemy.
Everyone who gets you out of crap is not necessarily your friend.
And, if you're warm and happy in a pile of crap, you may just want to keep your mouth shut.