Oral Jokes / Recent Jokes
ORAL SEX - AN ODE TO LOVE
Penis breath, a lover's dread,
Is what you get when you give head.
Unpleasant as it tends to be,
Be grateful that he doesn't pee.
It's times like this, you wonder why,
You bothered reaching for his fly.
But it's too late, can't be a tease,
Accept the facts, get on your knees.
You know you've got a job to do,
So open wide and shove it through,
Lick the tip then take it all.
Don't drag your teeth or he might bawl,
Slide up and down, use your tongue.
And feel the precum start to run,
Your jaw it aches, your neck is numb,
So when the fuck's he gonna cum.
Just, when you can't take anymore,
You hear your lover's mighty roar.
And when he hits that real high note,
You feel it oozing down your throat.
Salty, fishy, sticky stuff,
Okay already, that's enough.
Let's switch you say, before you gag,
And what revenge, you're on the rag.
A man went to the dentist to get his teeth checked. While he was sitting in the chair being examined, the dentist said to him, "Have you done oral sex lately?"
The man replied, "Why yes, I did this morning actually. How could you tell? Did you find a pubic hair stuck in my tooth?"
The dentist says, "No, not quite. You've got some shit on the end of your nose!"
A man went to the dentist to get his teeth checked. While he was sitting in the chair being examined, the dentist said to him, "Have you done oral sex lately?"The man replied, "Why yes, I did this morning actually. How could you tell? Did you find a pubic hair stuck in my tooth?"The dentist says, "No, not quite. You've got some shit on the end of your nose!"
How can you tell if your date really digs oral sex? She hikes up her skirt every time you yawn.
The difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer is in the taste.
This was just posted to the newsgroup "alt.config" and most of the alt.sex newsgroups to propose creation of a new group "alt.sex.oral". I think you might find it interesting.
Paul Robinson
"The Greatest Philosopher in the World, maybe the Greatest who ever lived."
There has been some questioning as to why there isn't an "alt.sex.oral" newsgroup since almost every other sexually related practice has one of its own.
There is quite a bit of interest in this subject, as it has gotten a lot of tongues wagging about it.
It is a subject of very hot debate, and considerable jawing and movement of mouths.
It has been known to raise a significant response in men, and a smaller response in women. Perhaps women are more "open" to this subject.
It is a subject of considerable interest from many angles, as much as 21 (degrees) reduced from 90.
It is often enjoyed by more than one person, as some people find that the more...