Orgasm Jokes / Recent Jokes

Why do so many women fake orgasm? Because so many men fake foreplay.

How can a woman tell if she is having a super orgasm?
Her husband wakes up.

Sex is the most practical and funniest (full of fun) ways of losing weight.
Look how many calories you can burn:
Taking Off The Clothes
With her agreement 12 cal
Without her agreement 187 cal
Taking Off The Bra
With both hands 8 cal
With one hand 12 cal
With one hand being slapped 37 cal
With the mouth 85 cal
Putting On The Condom
With erection 6 cal
Without erection 315 cal
Preliminaries
Trying to find the clitoris 8 cal
Trying to find G spot 92 cal
Without caring at all 0 cal
When Doing It
Holding her up 12 cal
Just on the floor 8 cal
Positions
Daddy-mummy 12 cal
69 laying 8 cal
69 standing up 112 cal
Trolley 216 cal
Italian chandelier 912 cal
Having An Orgasm
Real 112 cal
Fake 315 cal
Post Orgasm
Staying in bed 18 cal
Jumping off the bed 36 cal
Explaining why she jumped off the bed 816 cal
Getting The Second Erection
Between 16 and 19 years of age more...

Sex is the most practical and funniest (full of fun) ways of losing weight.
Look how many calories you can burn:
Taking Off The Clothes
With her agreement12 cal
Without her agreement187 cal
Taking Off The Bra
With both hands8 cal
With one hand12 cal
With one hand being slapped37 cal
With the mouth85 cal
Putting On The Condom
With erection6 cal
Without erection315 cal
Preliminaries
Trying to find the clitoris8 cal
Trying to find G spot92 cal
Without caring at all0 cal
When Doing It
Holding her up12 cal
Just on the floor8 cal
Positions
Daddy-mummy12 cal
69 laying8 cal
69 standing up112 cal
Trolley216 cal
Italian chandelier912 cal
Having An Orgasm
Real112 cal
Fake315 cal
Post Orgasm
Staying in bed18 cal
Jumping off the bed36 cal
Explaining why she jumped off the bed816 cal
Getting The Second Erection
Between 16 and 19 years of age12 cal
From 20 to more...

Women - You Know the Honeymoon Is Over When. ..
15. Talking dirty in bed means shouting obscenities when he hogs the blanket.
14. Chivalry's as dead as the door he lets slam in your face.
13. PMS lasts all month.
12. Your jumbo box of absorbent maxi-pads is on open display.
11. "Honey, what are you thinking?" is now "Are you finished yet?!"
10. He yawns when you bitch about that guy hitting on you at work.
9. Dildos, S & M, menage. .. anything to break the monotony.
8. You used to walk hand in hand, now you run to keep up.
7. Those frilly, lacy, tiny panties have become way too uncomfortable.
6. Two weeks no orgasm.
5. Three weeks no orgasm. .. and you still don't miss it.
4. When he lends you five bucks, he expects it back.
3. You'd rather spend quality time with your vibrator.
2. The way he breathes is getting on your nerves.
And the number one sign the honeymoon is over. ..
1. You more...

What's an orgasm, mom? I don't know, dear...ask your father.

Q: What is that insensitive bit at the base of the penis called?
A: The man.
Q: Why is psychoanalysis quicker for men than for women?
A: When it's time to go back to childhood, he's already there.
Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?
A: Trustworthy.
Q: Why are men like commercials?
A: You can't believe a word they say.
Q: Why are men like blenders?
A: You need one, but you're not quite sure why.
Q: Why do so many women fake orgasm?
A: Because so many men fake foreplay.
Q: Why are women so bad at mathematics?
A: Because men keep telling them that this (make gap with thumb and forefinger) is 9 inches.
Q: What's a man's definition of a romantic evening?
A: Sex.
Q: What is the only time a man thinks about a candlelight dinner?
A: When the power goes off.
Q: What do men and women have in common?
A: They both distrust men.
Q: How can you tell the difference between men's real gifts and their guilt gifts?
A: more...