Overseas Jokes / Recent Jokes

A young ensign had nearly completed his first overseas tour of sea duty when he was given an opportunity to display his ability at getting the ship under way. With a stream of crisp commands, he had the decks buzzing with men. The ship steamed out of the channel and soon the port was far behind.
The ensign's efficiency has been remarkable. In fact, the deck was a buzz with talk that he had set a new record for getting a destroyer under way. The ensign glowed at his accomplishment and was not all surprised when another seaman approached him with a message from the captain.
He was, however, a bit surprised to find that it was a radio message, and he was even more surprised when he read, "My personal congratulations upon completing your underway preparation exercise according to the book and with amazing speed. In your haste, however, you have overlooked one of the unwritten rules. Make sure the Captain is aboard before getting under way!"

A tourist from Albegestan goes on his first overseas trip.Upon arriving, he is visibly puzzled filling his visaapplication. The border official look s over his shoulder, and sees the tourist trying to write 'Twice a week' intothe small space labeled 'SEX'. The official explains: "No, no, no. That is not what wemean by this question. We are asking 'Male' or 'Female'." "Doesn't matter," the tourist answers.

Following some duty overseas, the officers at the Fort were
planning a welcome home party and dance for the unit. Being
an all male combat force, they decided to request coeds from
some of the surrounding colleges to attend.
The Captain called Vassar and was assured by the Dean that
arrangements could be made to send over a dozen of their most
trustworthy students.
The Captain hesitated, then said, "Would it also be possible to
send a dozen or so of the other kind? "

One of my first evenings back from overseas, my girl's understanding parents left us alone in the living room. Naturally, we did not talk all the time. In the midst of a kiss, I noticed her little sister in her nightgown watching us from the doorway."If you will be a good girl and go to bed, I will give you a quarter," I said to her.Without taking the bribe or saying a word, she ran off but soon was back again."Here is a dollar," she said. "I wanna watch."

Following some duty overseas, the officers at the Fort were planning a welcome home party and dance for the unit. Being an all male combat force, they decided to request coeds from some of the surrounding colleges to attend. The Captain called Vassar and was assured by the Dean that arrangements could be made to send over a dozen of their most trustworthy students. The Captain hesitated, then said, "Would it also be possible to send a dozen or so of the other kind?"

A nurse who works here in America, New York to be exact, wanted to make an overseas phone call, so she dialed the operator... Nurse: "Operator I would like to place an overseas call to the Philippines". Operator: "OK, miss, what is your name?" Nurse: "Maria Quintero" Operator: "Could you please spell your last name Maria?" Nurse: "Ok, Quintero... Q as in Cuba... U as in Europe... I as in eyebrow... N as in pneumonia... T as in ptyalin... E as in India... R as in Argentina... O as in Australia.