Pate Jokes

A middle-aged executive was becoming increasingly irritated by the constant ribbing he received at the hands of junior employees who couldn't resist making fun of his baldness. One morning, a particularly brash trainee had the gall to run his hand across the older man's pate while loudly exclaiming, "Feels just like my wife's ass!"
With a look of genuine curiosity, the aging exec also felt his gleaming pate. "You're right," he said, "so it does, so it does."

The following, said to be a true story as seen by millions of viewers on a Spanish T.V. Channel:

The parents of a teenage girl decided to put their daughter's name forward for a Surprise Game Show - she idolised Teen-Age Pop Star "Ricky Martin", and they arranged for TV cameras to be placed throughout the house.

The house was then left empty with Ricky Martin hidden in the wardrobe in the girls bedroom - all set to give the daughter a wonderful surprise. However, upon returning home from school and finding the house empty, the daughter made her way down to the kitchen where she opened the fridge and removed a tin of pate - at this stage the live TV audience is wondering "what the hell is going on?

She then went back upstairs to her bedroom where she proceeded to remove all her clothes and spread pate all over her triangle of womanhood (at this stage Ricky Martin is still hidden inside the wardrobe, and half of Spain is seeing a young more...